Paradox Museum – 30/10/24

Welcome to Day #10 of the ever-lasting half term. Eva’s out there in the dark streets, covered in watermelon juice and begging for sweets from strangers. Standard stuff. But while it seems that we’ve given up on parenting today, I did spend some quality time with her yesterday…and that involved a trip to the Paradox Museum with the Hollies.

We met at Waterloo and had a nice lunch at a slightly-overcrowded Giraffe on the South Bank. We were seated outside, where it was fairly calm, but the inside was packed with toddlers. I sometimes miss the original LWAT days but…not always.

We then hung out at the playground for a bit. It’s had some new features since I last visited, including some pirate ships that seem to lurch dangerously towards passers-by and threaten to take their eyes out. All the better for being pirates, I guess. We had a quick trip to Primark in Tottenham Court Road, where Holly bought some emergency shoes and Eva stung me for three items of “fashion” – a waistcoat, a pair of fluffy socks and a pair of fake Ugg boots. Like I said, it was quality time.

Along the way, we looked in at Outernet where you seem to be able to interact with the Tetris film through an app. We didn’t entirely work out how but there was a QR code at the end of the film to scan to join I think.

Then it was time to head to Knightsbridge for the Paradox Museum. We hopped on the Piccadilly Line, which was fairly swift and gave us enough time to have a snack at Pret (without the discount. Sob!) I always allow a bit of extra time for getting into places like this and so we were there well before our ticket time but that’s not necessary – you’re only let into the building at the timeslot so all the toilet trips, cloakroom etc have to be done after that. So don’t bother turning up 15 minutes early cause there’s nowhere to queue and it won’t be time well spent. We probably should have stayed in Pret.

But once we were inside, all was straightforward. There weren’t too many people jostling to get in at once so we had a few calm minutes to put our stuff into a locker (including the two extra pairs of shoes we were now carrying). Then it was through the lightboxes into the exhibition:

From the adverts, you might think this was similar to the Twist Museum and you’d be right. It has the same kind of format, where the big photo opportunities have smaller illusions and points of interest in between, which is good when the photo opps often have a bit of a wait. The first illusion was the conference table, which I didn’t get a good picture of because it was quite dark but essentially it was a mirror illusion where two of the kids could turn themselves into an entire council. Who, weirdly, never seemed to reach a consensus on everything. Like most meetings, really.

We skipped over the Shadow Freeze as someone else was using it and headed for the Tilted Room, stopping to look at some of the smaller exhibits along the way. Such as this little guy:

We hadn’t booked the Zero Gravity experience so the next room was the Camouflage Room:

Eva’s one desire was to be a “floating head”, which I think she achieved:

Nearby, these was also a colour room like the one at the Science Museum:

And a pretty piece of butterfly art:

The next room had a lot of the most popular photo opportunities. Before I get into the head-on-a-platter, please do enjoy this freakish mashup of mine and Eva’s faces:

I didn’t get any good pictures of the Illusion Throne but here’s that head on a platter you ordered:

So, she got to be a floating head more than once. Who says I don’t know how to show her a good time?

Maybe I can stick the floating head on this pair of legs I found on the Paradox Sofa – now I just need somebody for the middle.

I can’t remember the exact order of the rooms after that but there was a TARDIS which contained an infinity room (it’s bigger on the inside!) and this very 90s-music-video piece of art:

Plus the classic “Usual Suspects” illusion. There were orange jumpsuits to wear but none of the kids had the patience to work out how to put them on. But here are the tiny and giant versions of Eva:

They grow up so fast!

Sadly the balcony was closed, so we couldn’t take in the view of Harrods opposite. At the moment, the Harrods windows are covered up – presumably in preparation for Christmas – but I imagine it will be an amazing view in a few weeks’ time. We made do with this view instead:

The penultimate room is tube-themed, with the Paradox Tunnel and a walk-in kaleidoscope. The Paradox Tunnel moves as you walk through, which did make me feel a little motion sick but it was a cool effect:

And the kaleidoscope was Halloween-themed:

Talking of kaleidoscopes, I forgot to include yet another terrifying Eva-image from earlier:

Truly too many EKs.

The final room was the Mirror Maze, which again I didn’t get a good picture of, but before then was the image you’d probably recognise from the posters. Here we are at the LUL Paradox:

(With thanks to Holly for her excellent and patient photography skills)

So there was a lot in there but we only took around an hour to look at everything, including the gift shop. It’s fairly expensive for what it is but you can get some great photos and it’s just the kind of thing that tweens enjoy. It wasn’t too crowded and we didn’t have massive waits for anything, which was good but there were a couple of bottlenecks. It’s probably worth going round twice if you can as I’m sure there’s stuff we missed. It was a smallish space but they fit a lot in there. I’d say it was similar to the Twist Museum and probably not quite as good as Dopamine Land. But certainly a good way to spend an October afternoon.

For more info, click here.

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“Dr Strangelove” at Noel Coward Theatre – 22/10/24

Wow, we have been ever so stage-y this half term. Macbeth last Friday evening, Musical Con on Saturday and yesterday Eva and her BFF went to see “Heathers” in Oxford. I’m not reviewing that one because I was in the office in a state of pastry-induced hysteria. But she got to wear her Veronica outfit again and they had a wonderful time by all accounts.

What I am going to review tho, is the missing piece of the mega-theatre puzzle – the anniversary trip Nathan and I took on Tuesday night to see Steve Coogan in “Dr Strangelove”. Yes, just the two of us and no kids. I’d heard about the show through a well-targeted Facebook ad and bought tickets as a birthday present for Nathan. It’s almost 6 weeks after his birthday but he’s not complaining – it’s gone on for a really long time this year. I expect the same for my 45th.

It’s been a while since I saw the Kubrick film but I had a fairly good idea of what to expect. Steve Coogan began his career as an impressionist, I believe, and I vaguely remember his switching of characters on “Coogan’s Run” so if anyone can pull off four characters (one more than Peter Sellers!) it’s probably him. I’ve always enjoyed Armando Iannucci’s work as well so that made me think this would be a good play. Until I looked at the cast list after the show, I would not have clocked that Peter from the 1980s “Narnia” TV show was also in it but….he was. I think his character was the one who had to go and buy fresh fish for Bakov. You’ll know what I mean if you’ve seen it.

So, a familiar story but I was looking forward to seeing how they’d bring it to life. It can be hard to transition from screen to stage but we’d seen a battleship appear in Stranger Things so surely a B-52 wouldn’t be too tricky?

The play starts with a song – “Try a Little Tenderness”, which I believe was used for the opening credits of the film. Having characters singing it live made me wonder if it was actually going to be “Strangelove: The Musical”, which I wouldn’t object to but it might be a bit of a shift in mood. But then the curtain opened on the set of General Ripper’s office and from then on, it was apocalyptic screwball comedy all the way.

Steve Coogan is in pretty much every scene so this first one was when he was playing the uptight Brit, Captain Mandrake. As someone who’s built his career on awkward British types, this was a very natural fit and the interplay between him and the All-American General Ripper (John Hopkins) was delightful. There’s not much time to establish the characters before the situation escalates into all-out chaos but it’s deftly handled and there’s a sense of tightly-controlled panic, especially when Ripper pulls the gun out for the first time.

The action then shifts to the War Room at the Pentagon and the second of Steve’s characters – the President. This is more of a straight-man role so, although he does a convincing American accent and sets up the gags nicely, it’s not the best showcase for his skills. But it’s a good, neutral filling between the slightly crazier slices of bread either side – the physical comedy of Mandrake and, of course, the eponymous Doctor. We’ll get to him.

First though, a shout out to the set designers. The giant War Room table appears as if from nowhere, complete with glasses and other breakable things that suggest they had to be a bit delicate putting it into place. The set feels very Kubrick in nature and I think the table in the film was green, just like this one was. Of course, that was a detail that was slightly lost on the viewing public seeing as the film was in black and white but Stan was just that kinda man. The significance of the green is meant to be like they’re playing poker with humanity, which is a nice bit of symbolism. We were a bit too high up to properly see “The Big Board” but there were screens in the boxes on the side, which showed what was on it so we didn’t miss out. Like the Russian Ambassador, we studied them with interest.

I won’t go through every individual actor as this was a fairly large cast, compared with some we’ve lately. The War Room scenes are very much an ensemble piece, with all the different Chiefs contributing to the madness. General Buck Turgidson (Giles Terera) and the aforementioned Russian Ambassador (Tony Jayawardena) are probably the stand-out characters in these scenes as they clash so frequently and almost come to blows (prompting the immortal line “Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here…this is the War Room”) . While these scenes were funny, I was almost distracted by watching for how they were going to swap President Coogan out for Dr Coogan. When it came to it, it wasn’t overly subtle…the President went to the back of the stage to make a call to the Vice President and remotely address a swimming gala. While his back is turned and he wanders in and out of view a few times, a wheelchair approaches from the left. To be fair, I don’t think it was ever meant to be a gasp-inducing illusion and it was done very smoothly. In fact, I didn’t notice the switch back and I really was watching out for it.

So, onto the titular character. Obviously the most extreme comedy character of the show and one that Steve Coogan was clearly having fun with. His German accent was a caricature but he kept it consistent and the jokes about his Nazi past were played with the right mix of shame and edginess. I wasn’t sure whether these kind of jokes would be acceptable in the age of trigger warnings but you can’t really have the character without them. I don’t think this production was looking to make any statements that were grander than “isn’t war a bit crappy?” and “things have not changed as much as we’d like since the 60s”. It certainly hit both those notes and looking at the world around us, with the US election coming up and all the various conflicts going on in the world….well, it is depressingly pertinent.

Act One ends with a bang, which is sad for anyone who wanted to know more about the Fluoride Conspiracy. But good for those of us who were craving some sugar – being right in the back row meant we were first in the ice cream queue and we had plenty of time to enjoy it while listening to an early 60s soundtrack – The Ronnettes and Elvis, among others. I should also say, having complained about the toilet situation at Macbeth, that there were no queues at all at Dr Strangelove. And us middle-aged women do appreciate that.

Act Two started with the appearance of the B-52 – and it really was impressively sized. I’d heard from the production team’s social media posts that this might be somewhat of a challenge but they aced it. Of course, it was one of many challenges that the team faced as getting Steve Coogan through a full costume change every scene (trousers and everything!) can’t have been easy. The B-52 contained Steve’s fourth character – the one played by Slim Pickens in the film. Apparently Peter Sellers was meant to play all four as well but apparently sprained his ankle and couldn’t work in the aircraft set. Again, this role is quite a broad comedy one – Texan accent, American bravado and a whole heap of communistophobia. Steve Coogan seems quite relaxed with this again, enjoying the caricature, and he seems to play it very naturally. I was trying to think on the way home which other actor would pull this off with such ease and I was kinda stumped. Maybe Reece Shearsmith? It certainly is a demanding play in every aspect – not just the costume changes but the number of lines to be learnt and all the physical comedy as well. But it’s a triumph.

I won’t say too much about the ending because I don’t want to spoil it for anyone else who might go. I mean, if you’ve seen the film you know what happens at the end but I was more thinking I didn’t want to spoil the surprise in the last scene. All I’ll say is it’s very in keeping with the film and leaves you somehow light-hearted despite how grim the reality would be if you thought about it too much.

So, all said, it’s a very faithful adaptation of the film and possibly has more laugh-out-loud moments. I did like the couple of lines that were clearly a bit of a modern update, such as when one of the men in the War Room acknowledged the gender imbalance around the table. But it largely feels nostalgic and in a good way. The cast are all superb and the set design, as previously mentioned, is very clever. Obviously Steve Coogan was the star many times over but the whole ensemble were great and it wouldn’t have worked if they hadn’t been so accurate on their marks (I don’t even know who the Mr President body double was but he was good at not giving the game away). I didn’t take the kids because they haven’t seen the film but actually, I think there’s plenty they’d enjoy here. And hopefully the play’s predictions won’t turn out to be too accurate….

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Musical Con – 19/10/24

I might have dropped some hints on this blog about what a musicals nerd I am. I don’t know – maybe it was the wandering all over Salzburg in search of a doorway that featured in the “Do Re Mi” sequence that you might have clocked. Or maybe the fact that I went to a musical theatre rave last year. Did I mention that we went to see Kathy and Stella twice over the summer holidays? Did any of these things give you a clue?

Anyway, I am pleased to confirm that I have spawned a mini-me, at least when it comes to musical theatre. I only heard about Musical Con a week before it happened but as soon as I told Eva about it she was insistent that we ad to go and she had to dress as Veronica Sawyer. Now, I don’t still see Heathers as a musical but her generation is never going to agree with me on that. Turns out that Veronica is a popular costume choice for Musical Con.

I had gone old-school, in exactly the way you might expect.

And if there’s any doubt that Eva is, in fact, my child I refer you to her comment as we went down the escalator to the Elizabeth Line. I said we needed the Abbey Wood branch to which she snickered, gestured at my costume and said “well that’s appropriate”. Which meant the song she was referencing got stuck in my head and I was on the Elizabeth Line quietly singing my own theme tune. I’ve even heard her singing on the Abbey Wood branch.

Talking of which, isn’t it so much easier to get to ExCel nowadays? We do love the Elizabeth Line. I mean, I obviously still love the wizard train but being able to change at Liverpool Street and be there in ten minutes is spectacularly convenient. And once you get to Custom House, ExCel is just a few minutes’ walk away.

What would have been even more convenient is if I’d looked for a cloakroom before we went into the ‘Con. I assumed there might be one inside but there wasn’t. It had been raining when we left the house so Eva and I both had giant winter coats plus my umbrella. It was roasting inside – as it often is at convention centres – so I was just carrying them all day. On retrospective research, it seems like I should have found the one for the whole centre before we went in. Ah well, we’ll know for next time.

We were aiming for the main stage as Eva wanted to see the “Hadestown” showcase but there was something that caught her eye on the way. Apparently, this is the original Persephone coat:

The opening ceremony was still in full swing when we got to the main stage and Eva was very excited to hear a rendition of “Candy Store”. I didn’t get a good picture as she was bouncing up and down too much.

I don’t remember exactly who sang what but our host Shanay Holmes certainly led us in a game of musical next lines – a bit of “Defying Gravity”, a bit of “When You’re Good to Mama” and a bit of “Oom Pah Pah”. I think I acquitted myself adequately. Shanay Holmes is the new Nancy, which we’ll get on to later, but also one of the creators of Musical Con.

She was everywhere throughout the day – singing on the main stage, running backstage to organise things, interviewing Broadway legends, being interviewed at the Backstage Theatre – and Instagram suggests she’s done the same again today. She is phenomenal! And I hope I get to see her Nancy.

After the opening ceremony came the “Hadestown” segment and it was everything Eva was hoping for. I should say that I don’t know the show very well as it’s one that she went to see with her BFF. I know a couple of the songs but not very well so it was all a bit new for me. The cast has changed over recently and the latest version of Orpheus and Eurydice were there to perform “All I’ve Ever Known” and then talk about their roles.

They were very excited still, with Dylan (Orpheus) seemingly especially starstruck by the whole experience. The current Hermes (Melanie La Barrie) was compering and was wonderfully warm towards the newest chickies in her pen. Sorry, I think I still had that song stuck in my head from mentioning it earlier. The new Eurydice (Madeline Charlemagne) was also very sweet and she and Dylan sang and danced beautifully together. Then they brought on the latest Hades and Persephone (Trevor Dion Nicholas and Rachel Tucker) who also seemed very happy to be part of the family but handling it all in a slightly more assured way, which is appropriate for their regal roles.

Then Melanie introduced a special treat for us all – the iconic Hermes, André De Shields. I knew he was being interviewed later in the day but I could listen to him speak forever….he has so much wisdom and also looks sensational in a gold suit. It was lovely to see the bond between the two Hermeses, with Melanie going down on one knee to pay tribute to him.

And I know I wasn’t alone in finding it emotional as I’m sure I saw Madeline wipe away a tear while he was speaking.

Then the whole cast performed “We Raise Our Cups” and Eva whooped and cheered before sinking to the floor, exhausted.

But not for long! She had shopping to be getting on with so she got back up and we went for a look around. We bumped into many other Veronicas, and she got her first Double-Veronica photo. Thank you random Veronica, whoever you are IRL. It really made Eva’s day to bond with so many strangers over a cosplay choice and this first one was especially keen to get a photo. How very.

I wanted to watch the “Les Mis” segment but Eva wanted to look around a bit more so she left me with the coats and went for a browse. I enjoyed the panel and the highlight was probably Milan van Waardenburg singing “Bring Him Home” in both Dutch and English.

Then it was almost time for lunch but first, a quick stop to do a Matilda pose:

And then a Korean burger for me and fries for us both from Destination Burger. There weren’t any Empty Chairs at Empty Tables so we sat on the floor and listened as the “Star of Musical Con” competition started.

I’ve no idea how the judges chose a winner because they were all incredible. I was in the loos for Eva’s favourite – the Phantom of the Opera guy – but from the ones I heard there wasn’t a bum note among them. And as a choir leader, I’m quite attuned to picking out bum notes.

Then Eva made me go shopping again and buy her a “Ride the Cyclone” pin. I’m not familiar with this musical – maybe because it hasn’t made it to the UK yet – but Eva assures me that it’s a “bop”. She later made me also buy Heather pins for her friends and then some mini-artworks which are now stuck to her bed. I might have left the Con a poorer woman but my heart was enriched.

I’m getting ahead of myself tho. There’s much more to tell you before we get to leaving.

Like the second appearance of André De Shields, where he talked about his three Cardinal Rules and sang “Road to Hell”. He is a self-described EGOT, who just doesn’t have the Oscar yet but will do. Someone needs to sort that out! He was being interviewed by Shanay, who did a little spontaneous harmonizing with him on “Age of Aquarius”. It was beautiful.

And then I got Eva some more fries. Natch.

I also spotted the outside world briefly when queuing for the loos and it was gloriously sunny, which was surreal given it was disco-dark inside.

Then it was time for the “Oliver!” panel, which I’d been looking forward to because I was obsessed with “Oliver!” when I was Eva’s age. I’d been a workhouse boy in the school production in Year 7 and that sparked an obsession that was only halted by the next school production – “A Midsummer Night’s Dream”. Shakespeare and musicals…I do wonder where Eva gets it from.

I will say that sadly the “Oliver!” cast didn’t sing for us, which was a pity as they talked a lot about the music and it would have been lovely to hear some. But they did complete a raucous quiz about cockney rhyming slang with Mr Bumble playing the fabulous quiz host and Nancy (Shanay again!), Fagin (Simon Lipkin) and Bill Sykes (Aaron Sidwell) competing. Les, the show’s designer, kept score. It was really interesting to hear what they were planning to do with the show and especially good to hear Simon Lipkin talking about the more problematic aspects of Fagin. I got a chance to thank him personally when we were back at the pin stall later….as a Jewish person, that character can be conflicting so I’d love to see the less antisemitic version of him that Simon plays. I also thought I saw Simon Lipkin at a bus stop in Hackney this morning but I assume my brain was just refusing to switch out of MusicalCon mode.

Anyway, the panel persuaded me that we should really go and see the show and I will try to beg, borrow or cadge press tickets when it opens. Or I could even pay to go. I’m a fan of Shanay Holmes after this weekend so that’s another reason to go. The way she talked about the role and the iconic red dress was adorable and I’m sure she will be a brilliant Nancy.

It was about 3:30 by the time the “Oliver!” panel had finished and we were both starting to tire. Eva had been off looking around the stalls again so I went off, vaguely looking for her.

I looked in at the Backstage Theatre but all the seats were taken and while the seated people were wearing headphones, it would have been tricky to hear over the “9-5” medley coming from the main stage. So I found Eva – after being misled by at least 14 other Veronicas – and we went back to the main stage to watch excerpts from “Figaro” and “Little Piece of You”. “Figaro” wasn’t quite my thing, as it was a bit poppy but I’ve just listened to the other songs on YouTube and they’re more what I’d expect from a musical that’s referencing an opera. I think the song that was performed was “The Tease” and it was fine as songs go but just not show tuney enough for me.

However, I really liked the rockier sound of “Little Piece of You”, which was mixed in with the incredible soul vocals of Mica Paris (in equally incredible high heels). It’s only on for two nights so I doubt we’ll get tickets but it does sound intriguing.

After that, it really was time to head on with just a quick stop at the neon sign before we left. You’ll notice that we did the most basic package version of Musical Con – no workshops or meet and greets at the “Stage Door” (although could anything live up to our IRL Stage Door experience the previous night?). There’s probably so much more we could have got out of the day but we happily filled it just watching the acts on the main stage, looking at all the stalls, doing the photo opportunities and cosplay-spotting. That somehow made six hours whizz by without the add-ons. Maybe next year, we’ll plan it all a bit more but for our first Musical Con experience, it was just what we wanted. No time pressure, no queueing and all the joy of spotting people on rollerskates and dressed up as the entire cast of “Hadestown”. We’ll be back next year!

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“Macbeth” at the Harold Pinter Theatre – 18/10/24

A few minutes ago I wasn’t sure whether I’d ever mentioned my love of David Tennant on this blog but I’ve now done a keyword search and yes, I think I have mentioned it. So I probably don’t need to explain the frenzied hitting of the refresh key back in April that got me tickets to see the Timelord in the flesh. And not just tickets but Friday night tickets, which was ideal. I’m not saying the seats were ideal but I didn’t have to empty the bank account to get them.

I mean, they were steep and there wasn’t a lot of legroom. We had to climb a lot of stairs to get to them and there was only one toilet cubicle in the Ladies’ when we got there. Luckily the other middle-aged women who’d come to see DT were all very efficient when it came to toilet trips and we worked together to make sure everyone got a turn before curtain up. Not that there was a curtain – that’s more metaphorical. Maybe I should have said “before headphones on” as that was the true start of the play – the Wyrd Sisters cackling and whispering into our ears. You might think that having to wear headphones at the theatre is a bit of a gimmick and you’d be right. But I’m up for trying out a gimmick now and then and this was an interesting one.

The play is 1 hour 50 straight through with no interval – hence all the last-minute toilet trips for the middle-aged DT fans. That might sound like a long time to wear headphones for but it goes relatively quickly and it’s a small theatre so you can take them off and still more or less hear the dialogue if you need a quick break from them. As for the effect on us middle-aged women of David Tennant being able to whisper into our ears…..well, let’s not speculate on that.

The minimal set – one large square, a bowl of water and a glassed off area behind the stage – did suggest that this was going to be somewhat highbrow. I know some people would consider all Shakespeare to be highbrow but we watch a lot of Shakespeare and it mostly isn’t. But if this production was going to be both gimmicky and highbrow, was it going to even be enjoyable?

I can’t believe you even paused on that thought. It’s David Tennant. I’ve been known to rewind his banking ads to listen to them again because I would enjoy hearing that man read anything at all. And I should point out that this trip was a whole-family endeavour rather than just one woman’s crazed need to be close to the Timelord. Roo and Nathan both admire David Tennant because his CV is so packed with geekery – not just “Doctor Who” but also “Harry Potter”, “Good Omens” and even a voiceover role in “Star Wars”. So he’s probably one of Reuben’s favourite actors and Roo needs to revise Macbeth for his GCSE mocks so this was all for his benefit too. Eva needs no persuasion to come along to anything Shakespearean and she’s a DT fans for all the reasons above but also his “Duck Tales” work. Oh no, now I have that theme song stuck in my head.

I realise I’m over-justifying but I don’t want you to think that I dragged my kids along to this kicking and screaming. They were complicit in the DT-stalking. We’ll talk about the actual stalking later but let’s focus on the production itself for a while.

Because weirdly this did not just feature one man. The cast was small but there was a lot of multi-roleing which occasionally confused me. Lady Macbeth was played by Cush Jumbo, who gave the role the intensity and depth it needs. She and Macbeth seem to have a passionate relationship at the start, which gives credibility to the idea that she can persuade him to kill. It only occurred to me while watching this version that the Macbeths’ plot is entirely ludicrous. Macbeth becomes Thane of Cawdor – as predicted by the witches – and then decides that he needs to move on to the next stage of the prophecy pretty much the same day. Yes, there is a golden opportunity to kill Duncan while he’s at their house but also Macbeth makes a good point about how that isn’t really great hosting etiquette. The Banquo’s children part of the prophecy looks far ahead into the future as it talks about a line of kings….so who’s to say that the witches didn’t intend for Macbeth’s kingship to also take place in the future? Maybe once Duncan died of natural causes, Macbeth would have become king anyway. I know there are some pesky sons in the way but a quick Google suggests that Scottish kings of the time were elected rather than hereditary anyway.

But I guess Shakespeare didn’t have Google. And he didn’t worry about people nitpicking his work 400 years later. I’ve tried to nitpick Shakespeare before and it’s a futile endeavour.

Anyway, for dramatic purposes, Macbeth does listen to his controlling wife and chaos ensues. It would be a very short play if he’d decided to just let the prophecy happen in its own good time.

Before any killing can be done, however, there is a raucous party to be had. I haven’t yet mentioned that the production had a live Celtic band behind the glass panel and there’s no more striking moment than when they strike up in full-on drunken ceilidh mode. Then it cuts out for a few moments while the Macbeths contemplate their next move and then it’s back in full volume. The headphones really make you aware of all these changes in mood and it’s a bit of a rollercoaster ride. There’s dancing with pretty much the full cast and everything seems joyful on the surface but there’s a very dark undertone. The undertone quickly becomes the overtone, as the deed is done and Lady Macbeth covers for her husband’s incompetence. It’s all very intense and dramatic and just as you feel overwhelmed with the horror of what they’ve done, the lights come on and the tone shifts abruptly.

Again, this is an idea of Shakespeare’s that is beyond reproach but the insertion of a comedy night porter scene right after the murder is both genius and brain-hurting. This production’s version of that scene takes you right out of the play – the porter staggers about the audience making jokes about Donald Trump and Oasis and breaking the fourth wall. There are some genuine big laughs to be had in this segment and it acts almost as an interval where there is none. It might be jarring but it’s much needed – if you spent the entire time as tense as you are in the first section, you would leave the theatre as a nervous wreck. The porter guides the audience through some “Knock Knock” jokes and then slips easily back into the original text and pretty soon we’re back in the world of misty murder.

So, a few words about the performances. I’ve already mentioned Cush Jumbo but I guess you want to know a bit more about the guy who plays her husband as well, right? Well, he is excellent as Macbeth. Personable enough that you’re almost rooting for him but also channelling that scary villain energy we saw in “Jessica Jones”. And he has that authentic Scottish accent and realllly suits a kilt.

Now, enough about him. Let’s talk about the supporting cast – Noof Ousellam as the heroic Macduff, all righteous anger and grief. Benny Young as the stately Duncan but also doubling up as the Doctor, observing Lady Macbeth through the glass with the gravitas that gives the madness scene such depth. Ros Watt as a naive and desperate Malcolm – played very young in this case but it really works as Malcolm seems both unprepared and prepared to take the throne. Cal MacAninch as everyone’s favourite gone-too-soon character, Banquo. Really, there’s no need for him to be murdered and he’s played as a very likeable character up to that point, which makes it even more brutal. Rona Morison as that other unnecessary victim – Lady Macduff – and, again, she’s played very sympathetically which makes the audience uneasy because they know what’s coming. The lights go out as she dies but you can hear her screaming still, which is most unnerving. Jatinder Singh Randhawa as the aforementioned porter – excellently bawdy in his key scene but also propping up the rest of the show by playing a number of other roles as well. Moyo Akandé as the loyal Ross, putting in a solid performance and sensitively delivering the news to Macduff in a scene that feels tricky to play. Shakespeare again saw the opportunity for some oddly-timed comedy by having Ross say “they were well at peace” before revealing how final that peace was. Given the lack of logic in that piece of dialogue, it was very well played and very emotional. I’m not sure why things were swapped around so that Cush Jumbo had the scene with Lady Macduff that I think Ross is meant to…it wasn’t clear whether Cush Jumbo was playing Lady Macbeth here or a different character but it seemed odd that she might be playing this bit when she should have been descending into madness. I did say that multi-roleing confused me. On that note, Brian James O’Sullivan was another hardworking actor who filled multiple roles, including the one that Reuben apparently likes to play in class – “Murderer”. All the supporting cast switched roles seamlessly and became ensemble or dinner guests when needed so the entirety of the compact cast were on stage for much of the show. I’m not sure which child actor we saw but they also bore a lot of responsibility for playing multiple children throughout the story and they did extremely well.

The time flew by quite quickly considering there was no interval and the ending built up quite dramatically. It’s always a treat to watch the descent into madness and Cush Jumbo handled it magnificently, with more control than hysteria and never straying from her previous character while also showing us a woman lost. Her final blowing out of her light was poignant as light and dark were used to great effect throughout. The final fight between Macbeth and the army of Macduff was visceral and there was some wonderful tension when it came down to the last two standing. It was hard not to root for Macbeth because, as previously discussed, he was very charismatic. But as he lay dead on the stage, not moving for ages, a sense of righting the wrongs pervaded. You know he has to die and deserves to die but oof, it feels like a waste.

Happily, that’s all just theatrics and David Tennant proved himself to be alive and well at the stage door after the show. Yes, we did the stage door thing for once and yes, it did feel a bit stalky but we were in good company – the whole pavement was packed with people who wanted autographs or photos or just to be in his presence for a moment. We hadn’t brought anything to sign but did get close enough to get a couple of fuzzy pictures. To his credit, he greeted the crowd with a cheery “Hello there!” and signed everything that was held out to him. I hope I never hear anything bad about that man because honestly, he seems like such a good human being as well as a handsome one. But hey, I thought the same about a certain Britpop singer and that broke my heart a bit when some news came out.

I do feel a bit bad for the rest of the cast who probably had to wait until the DT-Mania died down before they could leave. They all gave excellent performances as well but probably don’t have quite the same reception as the celeb actor. But then they’re probably acutely aware of that when signing up for anything which potentially has a bit of stunt casting to it.

But in this case, the stunt worked! The celeb was a good fit for the role, the gimmicky aspect of the production actually made it a really interesting and unusual experience and the whole thing worked together to deliver something new, which is admirable for a 400-year-old text. I think this run is almost entirely sold out but if it ever gets another revival, it’s well worth scrambling for tickets for. You might even get a glance of the man himself.

No disclaimer needed as I paid for tickets but all opinions remain honest and my own. Except the borderline creepy opinions which I’ll say are someone else’s.

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City Coffee and Chicken Row

As you may have discerned, I’ve gone through a break up. Breaking up is hard to do, especially when kids are involved, and I know that Eva is missing her regular cheesecake pots already. But let me be clear – it was Pret that changed. Not me. I didn’t do a thing wrong but somehow, this huge chain decided that the relationship where I consume more coffee than I pay for was not working for them. How outrageous.

Anyway, this left me with a twin dilemma….where to get my morning caffeine dose on the way to work and where I could sit if I’m ever early to pick Eva up from her Shakespeare class. So I’ve been doing some research and discovery.

We’ll start with coffee because nothing really starts without coffee. This is a classic “grass is greener” situation because when Pret and I were monogamous, I looked longingly at all the new hipster coffee shops popping up around Liverpool Street. But turns out, they’re not all I was dreaming of. 

My first stop was Blank Street Coffee, on Old Broad Street. I’d heard good things about the coffee but hadn’t realised that the ordering experience would be tricky without the app. There’s nowhere to queue or wait inside so you queue on the street to order and then again to pick up, all the while getting gazumped by people who were doing app pick-ups. I might just be too old for this. It was fine on a sunny day but I think queuing in the City drizzle for a coffee might kill what’s left of my carefree spirit. The coffee itself was decent and the Cinnamon bun was substantial but I’m not sure I can reconcile myself to the process as a regular thing.

Similar thoughts were had on my first visit to Pickwick Coffee Company on the same street. There was no way to pay by card except via the tips pad so I had to tap my card seven times. I later realised this was part of a global outage so not Pickwick’s fault. I’ve since given them a few more tries and the coffee is good. You even get a cup which shows you the view you’re looking at while you walk through the City. The cinnamon roll was also good but both coffee and roll are quite hipster in taste (roll understated, coffee slightly sweet) so while they were fine, they weren’t my favourite. Also, they use the word “demure” in their advertising:

The other place I mean to try is Grind, at the Royal Exchange. A colleague recommended it and they have cute baby-pink cups but the only time I walk to work from Bank rather than Liverpool Street is when things go wrong. Like they did last week:

Does this muddy field look like it’s near the Royal Exchange?

That meant I was already lateish for work when I was passing Grind and it looked like more crowded, app-based chaos. So I’m ashamed to say that I went to Starbucks instead. No queue and three people serving. It wasn’t great coffee but at least I wasn’t still in that field.

More recently, I’ve been frequenting Coco di Mama. A pasta place might not be the obvious coffee choice but Italians take coffee as seriously as they take pasta, right? This is about the right kinda taste for me and they give you an adorable little hazelnut cream biscuit to go with it. My only complaint is the inconsistency with the pastries – the first time I was there, I ordered an almond croissant and realised once I got to the office that I had a plain one. The second time, I ordered at the kiosk and it said that all the pastries were sold out even though I could see them right there at the counter. The third time, I was having a dairy fast and the vegan option was sold out. So not fully successful trips thus far. I’ll keep you posted.

And that brings me smoothly on to my other project – exploring the options of Chicken Row, in Walthamstow. Eva and I christened this bit of Walthamstow High Street after we saw three signs in a row, promising Fried Chicken, Crispy Chicken and Chickenpox:

What else could you need? With both Nandos and Popeyes on the other side of the road, it truly is the chicken capital of E17. I often have a few minutes to kill before picking Eva up from drama so I have been slowly trying out the various options and, once more, I have results for you.

I think my first venture was to Raya Street Food, which promised the crispy chicken. This is a snack size, which is where this whole project originated. I really didn’t mean to be eating a full meal while walking around Walthamstow in the rain but there is also the option to sit in at Raya, which brings me back to the initial dilemma…somewhere to wait that isn’t Pret.

The crispy chicken is somewhere between meh and nice depending on which sauce you choose. The sweet and sour was a bit bland but the sweet and spicy is really good. Service is pretty quick and it’s very cheap (£5.95). I think I had the spring rolls once too and they were also good.

Next door is You Me Sushi, which offers Japanese Fried Chicken for a hefty £11.50. It does come with rice and there is a lunch deal including a drink for slightly cheaper. Both times I’ve tried it there has been a wait of around ten minutes but they’re probably quicker at peak times. I can’t believe it was still warm enough to eat outside in the evening when I took this picture:

And I still got free Pret coolers then. Sob, on both fronts. The chicken is tasty but not sure whether it’s over-a-tenner’s worth of tasty. It’s more expensive than Kome in South Woodford and Kome is probably better. Also, we get random gifts like lids and hair removal cream from Kome. The You Me Sushi chicken came with pickles but it was pickled ginger which is like biting into perfume. Sorry, that’s not for me.

Of course, we’ve tried Nandos a million times so it doesn’t really need to be included in this experiment but here’s a picture of our visit in August just for the sake of it:

You know the deal with Nandos – not as cheap as it used to be but still tasty, fresh, spicy chicken. I went to the one in Islington with Reuben today and it was as good as it ever was.

Don’t listen to the haters. Or Eva, who refuses to go there because of their aggressive promotion of chicken-eating…although she’s quite happy to go to Popeye’s with Bunny and that’s a chicken place too. Maybe that’s because she enjoys its resemblance to Perry the Platypus

Talking of Popeye’s, that has indeed featured in my chicken odyssey. I ordered some tenders with hot honey dip and I wasn’t expecting much but I was pleasantly surprised. The tenders were very fresh, very hot and the coating was super crispy. Much nicer than you’d get in McDonalds.

There are two further contenders that are near, but not on Chicken Row. One is Sushi Handroll on Hoe Street, which I decided to try when it was hammering it down and I couldn’t be bothered to wait for the lights to change so I headed down Hoe Street instead of across it. It also doesn’t do anything in the sweet and spicy chicken range, so not directly comparable. I got a chicken katsu curry and it was perfectly eatable – a bit like the Abokado version but with the chicken sliced nicely so that you can actually the strips with chopsticks. Plus they include pickles, which is always a bonus (unless it’s ginger, as previously discussed). The main thing I remember is that they were paying “Next Episode” while I was waiting and that confused my Pavlovian reaction because – thanks to the Snoop Dogg JustEat adverts – I crave takeaway every time I hear that song. But what to do when you already have takeaway on the way? Confusing.

The last one I’m going to mention is much further down the High Street – Chopstix just on the side of the Mall. I have eaten here before and it’s a very cheap option but not necessarily the most gourmet. It’s what you’d expect for a tenner for two different mains, rice, a drink and spring rolls. I went there last week when I needed to sit in somewhere and the food was again not too exciting. However, the service was super-friendly not just to me but also the teenage boys who came in after me. It felt like I was in no way being a problem sitting there at almost-closing time and that made the sweet and sour and Korean BBQ chicken taste a little less bland. It was also really hot, which was good as you imagine those kind of places serving food that’s a bit lukewarm. So a bargain price and a warm welcome in every way. A good place to finish up….I still haven’t found the ideal chickenery but the search continues….

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“Festival of the Girl” – 05/10/24

This is our third year at the Festival and Eva’s at the top end of the age range – something I didn’t think about until I realised that one of her classmates from primary school had been promoted to helper status. So it might be our last one as punters but you never know – they may launch a follow-up “Festival of the Almost-Woman” for teens if we’re lucky.

We’d booked into the SEN session, which is shorter and quieter than the others…the shortness meant we should probably get there on time but Eva isn’t a fan of mornings. So we left slightly later than planned and paused to get hash browns at the Station Cafe.

Still, we made it there just 15 minutes into the session, which was pretty good going. There were sunglasses and ear defenders on the door so we collected some ear defenders just in case things got noisy but didn’t really need them too often.

We had a bit of a breeze around everywhere, both upstairs and down and stopped briefly to talk to a friend on the Girls Friendly Society. Eva also voted in their poll about school toilets. Then we went to visit the Sister Motion stall and were taken through to their studio in a quieter part of the building.

Eva was chosen to be the assistant cameraperson, which meant she got to call for “Quiet on Set” and use the clapperboard. We later sat down with the editor to see how it all came together and the the technology she was using looked a lot fancier than the free version I cobble choir videos together on. That’s Goals right there.

We didn’t have long to spend with Sister Motion as Eva was booked onto the 12:30 Bubbleology workshop. On the way, Eva bought a sage green crystal bracelet to match her outfit. Not sure whether it’s meant to have mystic-y properties but the colour palette is on point.

The Bubbleology workshop was run by Tammy King and was only for the SEN session as she’s autistic herself and wanted to do something specifically for that crowd. She described how blowing bubbles could avert a meltdown and increase calmness and there was plenty of opportunity for the kids to get hands on with the bubble mix. Eva even managed to get one of the touchable bubbles to balance on her fingers:

Incredibly, although we felt like we’d just got there we were already running out of time. Eva had seen a DnD stall earlier and wanted to revisit so she sat down and played the mini-est of mini adventures. Tho I think the normal rules were bent slightly for the occasion – Reuben’s reaction to “casting a fireball in a confined space” was a sad headshake – it was still a proper game and she and a couple of other girls managed to slay the dragon and steal its treasure. Even if one them was an octopus. I think the club was called Flamethrowers and Dreamcatchers but they’re only operating in Muswell Hill at the moment. I told them to look us up if they ever move eastward….they seem like a friendly bunch and Roo is certainly always looking for opportunities to play.

Oh and I almost forgot that we also got free ice cream from the Wuka Wheel of Fortune….or at least Eva did. I’m off dairy at the moment. Bah! Still, at least I got to hold her ice cream, while she played DnD.

On the way out, we saw this rather lovely representation of London:

The Business Design Centre always has some interesting artworks. I doubt I’ll get much time to enjoy them when I’m back there for work purposes in December….

We went to get some lunch at the usual place and then, partly inspired by the bubble workshop, stopped off for some bubble tea:

As we were in the area, it seemed almost rude to not visit Cass Art and luckily I got away with only funding a handful of pens and pencils.

But it was student weekend so they had free snacks, giveaways and a large doodle board outside. People who were clearly not students – unless Cass meant Year 7 students – had written “Skibbidi Toilet” and “Sigma” over the board <sighs in Gen Alpha>.

But someone had also drawn and labelled a platypus, which delighted Eva as she could add a hat and turn it into Perry:

She also added an eye, which is apparently her tag nowadays. I didn’t realise she’d joined the VFD

So a nice afternoon out even if I got rinsed for bubble tea, crystals and art supplies as well as lunch. This is what tween parenting is like. It might be our last FotG as punters but I’m sure we’ll find ways to stay involved. But for now, thanks for having us!

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“Holst – The Planets” at the Royal Albert Hall – 21/09/24

It was Nathan’s birthday recently. I won’t say which number it was but it wasn’t a very major one…..more like a stopping point between major ones. Nevertheless, we’ve made the most of the celebrations, starting with an outdoor cinema trip in August to see Blur: Live at Wembley:

It was a lovely warm evening at the Barbican and the rain held off, which was just as well seeing as the headsets apparently didn’t react well to water. It was fun to see the gig from last year, even if it wasn’t the night we went to. And the Barbican conservatory is pretty cool by night:

So, that was Part 1. Part 2 was Disco 2000, Part 3 was drinks at a pub in Hackney and today was Part 4 – a bit of culture. Our last classical music outing – also at the Barbican – had been a hit with the kids so we decided to push the Star Wars music theme a little further and take them to hear the source material, which was “The Planets” by Holst. For legal reasons, I should say that John Williams did not directly source his melodies directly from Holst but there is definitely inspiration there.

And what a glorious venue to do culture in! We’ve been there before, to see a Proms concert and a Chickenshed show, but it was a while ago. Plus, it is impressive on every visit.

We were way up in the Rausing Circle – the second from top row – but because of the way the auditorium’s laid out, we could see and hear everything perfectly. There was a full house, including people sitting in the choir stalls which was confusing as I knew the Bach Choir were performing. Maybe they would just squeeze in between the eight kettle drums. Yes, you’re right…that IS a lot of kettle drums.

The concert had three parts to it – the opening piece was by Wagner, then a piano concert by Rachmaninoff before the Planets after the interval. The Wagner was typically bombastic and played expertly by the London Philharmonic Orchestra. There was a little bit of shuffling around for the Rachmaninoff so that the grand piano could be centre stage and the top opened up. No one dropped a fingernail inside the piano like I almost did at the Highams Park proms, so that was good. The conductor (Christopher Warren-Green) and some of the violinists left before returning with the pianist, Tom Poster.

I’m always impressed by people who can properly play piano, as opposed to my worship -fudgery style. He really was incredible and guided the orchestra through the different moods of the piece, which must have been at least half an hour long and in three movements I think. At one point, the melody seemed to be the verse from “All By Myself” – a quick Google in the interval confirmed to me that I was not going mad and that Eric Carmen lifted it pretty much wholesale from the concerto.

We had some ice cream during the break and settled back in for the headline piece. If I had one criticism of the first half, it was that there were no kind of visuals used – with all the lighting capacity of the Royal Albert Hall, it seemed like there was more that could be done rather than just white light. The difference in the second half was evident straight away, with the war-mongering theme of “Mars” blasting while the stage was bathed in red light. This really enhanced the mood of each piece, as well as being a handy cue for when we were moving from one planet to the next. There were only applause breaks between some movements and not others, which was confusing. Once or twice people applauded at a point that was just a suspenseful pause. Including possible someone from my family but let’s not name names.

“Mars” is definitely Star Wars-esque so a good dramatic start to capture the kids’ attention right away. “Venus” was more mellow and the lights changed to a soothing peach colour accordingly. “Mercury” was described in the programme as being “playful” and I think that’s pretty accurate. “Jupiter” is the obvious crowd-pleaser with several passages that are recognisable, especially to those of us that grew up listening to “World in Union” for the rugby World Cup.

The programme also says that “Saturn” didn’t seem popular at its early performances and I can see why. It’s more difficult to get a hold of than the others and it’s a stark contrast coming straight after Jupiter. Maybe I just need to listen to it a few more times to get it. “Uranus” was a lot more melodic and then we just had the weirdness of “Neptune” to go. The Bach Choir still hadn’t appeared on the stage but at some point, I clocked that they were in the standing circle right at the top. I’ve no idea how they sang such a tricky piece without being able to see the conductor of the orchestra but Reuben suggested that maybe they turned up to rehearsal. HE4 choirsters, take note.

So a fun and cultural outing which the kids seemed to enjoy. The length of the programme was about right and being an afternoon performance meant that they weren’t too tired. I left Eva’s umbrella under our seats so she and Nathan ran back in for it but happily that meant that we were still there as the crowds cleared and I spotted an old friend taking a photo in front of the hall. I didn’t manage to photobomb him despite my best efforts but when I then offered to take the photo of him and his wife as compensation, I spotted Nathan and Eva waving out of an upstairs window. Brolly retrieved, photobomb achieved. Good stuff.

And as an extra bonus we spotted this pigeon having a poop under the baskets in Gloucester Road Tesco. How very London….

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“An Inspector Calls” at Alexandra Palace – 04/09/24

In case you haven’t noticed, it’s back to school time. The former toddler is heading into his GCSE year so what better way to mark the occasion than to go and see a GCSE text live on stage? He obviously knew what was going to happen in it but I made him promise not to spoiler it for me. He did tell me that it would be sadly lacking in musical numbers – my expectations for a whodunnit have been significantly raised since seeing Kathy and Stella twice. I even suggested to Roo how an introductory song would perk things up a bit but he was not open to my suggestions or jazz hands. This play was significantly more sombre than the murder podcast musical and wasn’t really a whodunnit either. But we’ll get to that.

First though, a glimpse of the view from Alexandra Palace:

You really have to appreciate this because it was a right slog getting up there from the train station. I realised a little too late that we could have hopped a bus but never mind. They need a little funicular railway like they had in Zürich.

But still…worth it, right?

The inside of the palace is pretty spectacular too:

And check out this incredible photo montage:

The theatre itself is still in an ongoing restoration process I think – a quick google while we were waiting for the show to start suggests it was restored in the “arrested decay” style so a bit like Wilton’s Music Hall I think.

The show started with a child waving a flashlight through the audience and for a while I thought it was just someone trying to find their seat. Then he ran up onto the stage, switched an old-fashioned radio on and suddenly music was blasting out as the curtain rose. Turns out there were musical numbers after all.

There were lots of interesting choices in terms of staging. I think the play takes place entirely within a house but the house was more of a backdrop here, with most of the dialogue taking place on the street. At the start, the house is closed and self-contained so you can hear the family at dinner but not see them apart from tantalising glimpses. I wasn’t sure this would work for an entire 110 minutes so was glad when the set opened up and the characters were able to interact directly with the titular Inspector, who was lurking in a sinister way outside.

It was visually stunning though. The smoke, the rain, the silhouette of the Inspector as he waited…it was all super atmospheric and really ramped up the tension between the happy and relaxed family scene and the threat to their happiness just outside. It was the same set throughout the play but parts of it shifted – without giving away any spoilers – so it never felt stale.

Reuben had told me that there was a subtle political undertone to the script and I’m glad he did otherwise I might never have picked up on it. The socialist narrative was woven throughout but it’s telling that at the end, nothing seems to really have changed for most of the characters. Only a couple of them have learnt any kind of lesson. I won’t give away the ending but it is thought-provoking and Roo, having studied it, had a few theories of his own to share.

As I said earlier, I had no idea what to expect and thought it was a murder mystery. I was wrong – the death the inspector is investigating is a suicide and there’s no suggestion that any of the family members had any physical part in the death. It’s more about the events leading up to the suicide and who or what might have led her to do it. The plot is nicely twisty and although some points verge on predictable, it still had a lot of surprises for anyone who wasn’t reading it for GCSE.

In terms of age rating, it says 8 plus but there were a few references to things that younger kids might not understand, such as the bar for the “women of the town”. There are references to sexual assault and, obviously, suicide so it’s worth considering how sensitive your child is before booking. There are also a few jump scares and some very tense moments of both darkness and silence that younger kids might find disturbing. Even just now when I’ve played the trailer, Nathan described the music as “ominous” without knowing what it was I was playing. So beware of anyone who might be scared by that.

There’s also a bit of stage violence and lots of family conflict so be prepared for some tricky questions. Or divert them all to your child’s English teacher.

Roo appreciated seeing it come to life and thought it really helped with his understanding. It’s only on for a couple of weeks so if you have a similarly aged kid who might benefit from seeing it, it’s definitely worth a trip. The tickets were pretty reasonably priced, we had a good view and the play is a nice length (1 hr 50, no interval). Like most GCSE texts, it verges on the depressing but hey, it’s only theatre. And, as you’ll come to realise at the ending, who can tell what is real anyway?

No disclaimer needed as I paid for this one. All opinions remain honest and my own.

For tickets and more info, click here.

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Zürich with a Teenager

So, we’ve reached the last of the holiday posts just in time for school to start. We finished the last post in Friedrichshafen and that’s where we’ll pick back up, aboard the boat to Romanshorn.

This was a bit of the trip I’d been looking forward to and one of the Google reviews described it as “a very relaxing way to get to Switzerland”. Which it would have been if I wasn’t convinced that Eva was going to drop her phone off the edge. The sides only came up to seat level and so there was more than enough potential for it to go off her lap and into the green depths. I thought I was being overly paranoid but she dropped it on the edge of the platform at Leicester Square last night, so I think I’m justified.

Fortunately, she didn’t drop it and the views as we sailed were indeed soothing.

It cost around 32 Euros for the four of us and we bought a ticket that would have let us on any boat that day (they go hourly from Friedrichshafen, at 20 past). It took 45 minutes to get across the Bodensee and when we got to Romanshorn, we had around 45 minutes before our train to Zürich. In the original plan, we had a day in Romanshorn as I wanted to go to the Seebad but that would have meant finding left luggage and travelling with wet swimwear so would have been a hassle anyway. In the new plan, timings were a bit more compressed so all we had time for was a quick walk to the lakeside – with the luggage – and a sit down and snack under the tree

I did manage to spot our boat going back across the lake though, in between these fountains:

Then it was time for our train. It was about an hour to Zürich, past some nice rolling hills and picturesque countryside.

The change of plan meant we wouldn’t be going anywhere with proper mountains so the hills would have to do for now until we can get back to Europe and do the bits we missed.

Arriving in Zürich was full on – having been in a quiet small town for five days, we were suddenly in the middle of a bustling city again with trams, cars and buses all going in different directions as soon as we stepped out of the station. We’d booked into the Hotel Limmathof, which was just about visible from where we were – the giant “CAMPARI” sign on the roof made it easy to spot.

We’d planned to just leave our bags there and go for lunch but happily the room was ready early so we could check in. Along the way, we saw hundreds of swimmers floating down the Limmat with inflatable ducks. A weaner friend of mine was somewhere in there but weirdly enough I didn’t spot her. There were also real ducks:

Having checked in, we wandered the streets a little looking for food before deciding on Holy Cow Burgers. Eva had the veggie patty but wasn’t too fussed though she declared the fries outstanding. Roo and I had smoky BBQ burgers and I think Nathan had something chickeny. It was all good and they had a shady little outdoor area to sit so we could enjoy the summery weather.

Talking of which, it was really getting quite hot so it was time to try and find somewhere to cool down. I couldn’t watch the Limmat floaters with envy all afternoon. We’d successfully managed to buy 24 hour travel passes from a machine right outside the hotel, with the only complication being that you could only buy three tickets in one transaction and we needed four. I think it was about 6CHF each for the kids and about 12CHF so, after a second transaction, we had the freedom to roam around the central zone (Zone 110) as much as we liked. Plus the trams had aircon, which was heavenly on a hot day.

My first choice of swimming place was Seebad Utoquai as it looked nearby and had good reviews. Naively, I thought it would be similar to the Strandbad in Friedrichshafen where there were beach-like shallow areas but apparently not.

A conversation in German with an impatient young man on the counter revealed that the swimming areas were 10 metres deep – not ideal for those of us who weren’t real swimmers. Conscious of the growing queue behind us, I told him we’d think about it and ducked out.

A quick google came up with a more family-friendly alternative – Strandbad Tiefenbrunnen. This would be on the edge of where our travel passes got us to but still within the bounds. Google promised shallow water and grassy areas. We hopped back on the tram and within a few minutes we were there. There was a bit of a queue to get in, but nothing too bad, and my first priority was to get a drink of some kind. There was a window selling drinks on the outside of the queue but I didn’t want to risk leaving the queue and not being able to rejoin. So we waited until we were in and then found a little express shop where we could either pick up cans or fill a plastic cup from some large bottles of juice.

I chose the Apfelsaft and my goodness, it was the best thing ever. So cold and so fresh. I downed 5CHF’s worth in about ten seconds but it was worth it.

Then we found the shallow swimming area – also near the loos and the paddling pool – and set up camp under a tree. It was properly busy, way more so than the last Strandbad had been, but we carved out some space. I couldn’t figure out the changing rooms – I think maybe they were bookable as they all seemed locked – and the main changing areas were a bit of a walk away so I changed in the loos, which was probably against all the rules. Roo went to the mens’ only area back near where we bought the drinks. He is a bit of a rule-follower.

Eva and I spent most of the afternoon in the non-swimmer area, which was still pretty deep and strangely tidal. It was up to her armpits most of the time. At one point, the metal barriers to the actual lake broke loose and there was a huge gap between the non-swimmer area and the depths of Lake Zürich itself. Luckily Eva wasn’t tempted to try and push her luck. Roo, meanwhile, alarmed me by disappearing off and jumping into the lake from the diving board (the low one but still). I keep having to remind myself that he can swim just fine but I wouldn’t be a mother if I didn’t fuss occasionally.

We also spent some time in a round kids’ pool that was over a bridge. I’m not entirely sure how it worked but it was a bit like a flooded platform I think – so an artificial floor over the lake water but also full of lake water. It felt like being in a lobster pot but a good depth for Eva to potter about in. Weirdly slippery underfoot though.

At one point, we stopped for ice cream and I had an amazing lemon sorbet, along with a bottle of ice tea that I pretty much downed again. I know in theory if you’re dehydrated you’re meant to si[ fluids, not chug them but I’ve never quite got the knack of doing that.

We left the Strandbad at around six as I had one more thing I wanted to do before settling into our hotel for the night. All the recommendations for Zürich had mentioned the Polybahn – a funicular railway that takes you up the side of the hill to look over the city. I’d spotted the tracks while we were having lunch and had seen signs for it but couldn’t work out where to get in.

I felt somewhat stupid when I realised it was literally next door to our hotel. To be fair, it doesn’t look like a station as such but it’s where you get on. The travelcards we had for the day covered this as well so it didn’t even cost anything. It took a few minutes to get to the top and then we hung out for a while, looking over Zürich at sunset.

Before getting some more sunset shots from our hotel room:

For dinner, I just bought some bread, houmous and salami from the Migrolino supermarket a few doors down. It was pretty eye-wateringly expensive but that’s to be expected in Switzerland. We also bought a few breakfast foods because our next train was at 7:30 in the morning. Lucky we were so close to the bahnhof really.

And the next morning, we left a rainy Zürich for another four-hour train journey but we’re getting good at these now. Which brought to us full circle to Paris and so here is where the blogging odyssey ends. Thanks for sticking with it!

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Friedrichshafen with a Teenager

Now, where did we get to in my last post? Somewhere approaching our holiday apartment I think. I’d chosen Friedrichshafen as a place to rest for a couple of days after the big cities (Paris and Stuttgart) and before we moved on to a bit more exploring.

Welp, things didn’t work out as planned.

The first bit did – we arrived at the station and found our apartment, which was about ten minutes’ walk away. We even found the correct apartment after some confusion – mainly me telling Nathan entirely the wrong street number. I found the supermarket and got a few basic supplies to cook dinner, which was nice after having to eat out for a couple of nights.

Aaaand then I got ill. You don’t need the details but suffice to say, it threw our onwards travel plans into disarray and we never did make it Austria or Liechtenstein. We had nights in Feldkirch and St Gallen booked that we had to cancel and instead book a second apartment in Friedrichshafen for an extra two nights.

So we ended up spending the bulk of our holiday in one place and I spent a fair amount of that lying down with my head under a duvet. But eventually I was well enough to be out and about again, which was just as well seeing as we had a four hour gap between leaving one apartment and moving into the next. Once again, we needed a place to leave our worldly goods and after some hunting, managed to locate the luggage lockers at the station.

We had to go onto the platform, so luckily there were no ticket gates, and right at the end of Platform 1 were a stack of lockers with pretty pictures of the town on them. Most had a red light on, suggesting they were occupied, but the ones on the far side had a few with green lights. For a very reasonable 5 Euros (in coins of between 50 Cents to 2 Euros), we managed to fit three suitcases and two bags inside. I had hoped for maybe one or bags so that was a proper result.

With many hours still to go before moving back in, and with me still not at full strength, we wandered down to the lakefront to find somewhere to sit. It’s very pretty along there, with the boats in the harbour and Switzerland on the horizon. There’s mini golf, which Nathan took the kids to while I was hibernating., and ice cream and public loos. Plus there’s a Geldautomat, which is Eva’s favourite German word.

After a short sit down, the more ambitious of us decided to climb the Moleturm. Eva and I both got up about three levels before she remembered she didn’t like heights and I remembered that I hadn’t eaten for about three days. Only Nathan actually made it to the top. Apparently the views were nice.

It did remind me though that I should start the eating thing again and I could be tempted by Currywurst. We wanted to sit outside and this place was probably a total tourist trap but it ticked all the boxes.

Nathan and I had the Currywurst and Pommes Frites deal for 12 Euros each, Eva just had the Pommes and Reuben had a salami pizza. It would have been perfect if it hadn’t been for the wasps but Reuben managed to trap at least one in his Coke glass.

After lunch we wandered around the town a bit more and sat by the church in the shade for a while. The kids and Nathan also found a comic and games shop to browse through. We saw the outside of the Zeppelinmuseum but didn’t go in. It’s a very cool building though, and there’s a little zeppelin-themed play area just outside.

It’s all very mellow, which was welcome after the busyness of two cities in a row. Everywhere we went was walkable and you can see the Bodensee from lots of bits of the town.

The best bit was actually swimming in the Bodensee, which was what we did for most of the day on our last day there. The Strandbad was around fifteen minutes’ walk from the new apartment and only 4,80 Euro for a familieneintrittskarte for the day. Once you’re in, there are stands selling drinks and ice creams as well as “Potatoes” (wedges) and yet more currywurst.

There’s a playground and giant chess and inquisitive ducks, who Eva named Tom, Gary, Cheesecake, Computer Monitor, Essen, Child, Thomas Jefferson and, of course Geldautomat. None of the rest of us were convinced that these weren’t just the same two or three ducks over and over again but she claimed to be able to tell the difference.

The lake swimming was lovely, and the perfect way to sooth my head after a week-long headache. I feel like people in the Sadlers Wells books are always going off to convalesce in Switzerland and this had much the same feel…..I was regaining my strength through See bathing, not quite in Switzerland but certainly within sight of it.

In terms of practicalities, there were a few ways of getting into the water. There was a small pebble beach or an even smaller sandy one but the main ways were either down the concrete steps or along the metal pier into the deeper water. Not that the water got very deep, even at the end of the pier – I think Reuben could still touch the bottom all the way out there. I was slightly out of depth by the floating platforms but most of the way along I could still stand up. Non-swimmers had to stay within the roped off bit, so that’s where Eva hung out but she was quite happy. She could duck down and be up to her neck in cool water without having to cross the line.

It was a very happy place to hang out. As the temperature crept up, it did get very busy but nothing compared to Southend on a hot day. There was shade under the trees and Monster Slush on hand to cool us down. Plus there were all the facilities you need, like little changing huts and showers. And such a bargain too!

In some ways, it was good that we were forced to stay in Friedrichshafen longer than expected because it gave us a good chunk of time away from travelling, except for the bit where we had to drag our luggage around with us for a few hours. We got our laundry done, we lived very cheaply off pasta and potatoes and salami for a few days and we regrouped for the final bit of the trip that would take us homewards. But that is yet another post.

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