Now, I’m not sure what you’re expecting from a review of a 73-year-old play but I’ll tell you what you’re not going to get – spoilers. There’s a tradition of keeping the Whodunnit in this Whodunnit under wraps and I swear by all that is Christie that I will not be the blogger to break that tradition.
So what is there to say? Well, I can tell you all about the gorgeous little St Martin’s Theatre, which looks like it has barely changed since the 1950s:
And I can tell you about the slightly uncomfortable seats – not Gatsby by any stretch but not the most comfortable we’ve sat in either. Still, we got the cheapest tickets available and had a very decent view of the stage so can’t complain. I can tell you about the toilets, which were as bijou as its neighbour, the Ambassadors. And I can tell you a little about the production itself, which must have a reason for being the West End’s longest running play.
It’s a classic country house murder mystery set up. If it was a TV show, it’d be called a bottle episode – one set, eight actors, no multi-roleing (although there are some hats). The play starts with a scream, which I think chronologically fits at the end of the first act, and the radio announcer right at the start sets out the background to the mystery, which concerns a sudden death in Paddington. Incidentally, the radio announcer has been the same voice throughout the show’s run – Deryck Guyler recorded the announcement in 1952 and it has been used for every performance since.
The current cast are Georgina Duncan and Sam Hollis as Mr and Mrs Ralston, Adam Woolley as Christopher Wren, Lucy Tregear as Mrs Boyle, Neil Reidman as Major Metcalf, Chloe Fenwick-Brown as Miss Casewell, John Wark as Mr Paravicini and Jack Condon as Sgt Trotter. They all play the roles fairly straight, as they were first written and there’s no attempt to update the 1950s sensibilities for a modern audience. There are no cheeky winks, no anachronistic pop culture references and no shoehorned social commentary beyond what was in the original script. And I admire that – it must be tempting to try and tinker with things and give them more of a 2025 feel but what we’re looking at is essentially a time capsule and even if the actors were born after the play was written, they still handle the material as their predecessors would have. It’s an incredible thing to be part of – knowing that we’re in the same seats as the1950s audience and watching the same show.
When I say it’s lacking in cheeky winks, that’s not to say it’s lacking in humour. There was plenty to entertain even the Gen Alpha teen as I heard her guffawing a few times, especially at the antics of the childlike Christopher Wren. There are jokes written in but nothing that takes you out of universe. We are all in a snowy guesthouse in rural Berkshire and there is no demand of the audience other than to watch the mystery unfold. Even the reference to the Berkshire Police is accurate to the time – it would be Thames Valley Police nowadays but I have googled and apparently they have only been reducing crime, disorder and fear since 1968.
There are a few character choices that a modern audience might interpret differently to how they were originally written – the mannish Miss Casewell is clearly lesbian-coded in the eyes of the teens and the aforementioned Christopher is clearly neuro-diverse. But that’s just how these kids see the world – “Gatsby” and “Mincemeat” got similarly analysed afterwards.
The mystery stands up well too. There are enough clues dropped throughout that you can have a good chance of solving it (and we got pretty close with our interval theories) but it isn’t super-obvious. There are some large red herrings, as there should be, and it’s worth paying attention to the small details. Also, as is my experience with living in Berkshire, people will go to London any time they can just to avoid being in Berkshire for a day. Don’t blame me – Agatha Christie said it. Kinda.
Oh, and in case you were wondering….mango sorbet for me this time. Strawberries and Cream for Nathan and VK and crisps for Roo. This stuff is pretty much our staple diet this year.
So a more traditional show than some we’ve seen lately but a lot of fun nonetheless. It’s been on our to-see list for over 20 years now so a relief to finally tick it off…and seats were pretty cheap with London Theatre Week too. If you’re curious about what makes a play stand the test of time, it’s well worth a visit. Just don’t spill any spoilers…
When I said I didn’t mean to write two posts, you’ll realise that I definitely definitely didn’t mean to write three posts. But here we are. So far, I’ve told you about lounging and water parking and now for the whale-watching. I know, quite the change of pace.
This was again inspired by the Jet2 brochure but we found a few different ways of booking, all of which led to the same glass-bottomed boat. It was leaving from Dock 12 at Puerto Colón at 10:30 and whichever site we used, it would be the same excursion. Also, it was not glass-bottomed.
What they mean by that is that there are large glass windows in the bottom of the boat, that you can use to spot the wildlife. It is not, as you might think, a boat with an entirely glass floor.
We walked from the hotel and it was, again, around a kilometre to get there. When we got close, it occurred to me that we probably should have got a taxi, if only to get us up the road to the dock which didn’t seem to have any kind of pedestrian access. There was a promising-looking raised pathway on Google Maps but when we got there, we realised there was no way to get back down from the pathway to the dock. So it was a choice of either taking your chances in the road, facing down coaches as well as cars, or balancing on the edge of the dock itself, with nothing to stop you plunging into the harbour. We winged it with a little of both – swerving into the path of a coach when the dockside was blocked by a queue of passengers and squeezing past the queue when the road was blocked with cars.
After the Siam Park experience, I’m starting to think that H&S is not a Canarian speciality.
Anyway, we made it to Dock 12 intact and embarked fairly swiftly. Each family group was made to stop and have a photo taken on the way in but spoiler: we didn’t end up buying ours. We all looked sunburnt and apprehensive. It was never gonna make it to the family Christmas card.
Why apprehensive? Because of the prospect of seasickness, of course. A lot of the Google reviews of the trip had mentioned it in passing and, after playing in the waves at the beach, I was more than aware that they were…ungentle. I’m an easy puker at the best of times, although I somehow survived the very rocky trip back from France in 2019. It seemed likely that we would all struggle a bit on a catamaran that was tackling the high seas. The Royal Delfin website somewhat disingenuously advised to take medication before boarding but, despite my handbag resembling a mobile pharmacy, I haven’t trusted motion sickness tablets since the infamous Joyrides of the 80s.
With the mobile pharmacy failing to deliver, I stopped at the actual farmacia on the way. I left the hotel a few minutes before Nathan and the kids and didn’t tell them where I was going. I somehow felt that if I raised the subject of seasickness, then they would psychosomatically be more prone to it. So I remained vague about my early morning mission.
I needn’t have worried. It took approximately 10 minutes from sailing for the first sighting of not dolphins but the slightly-less-elusive green sick bags. A small child walked past us unsteadily and was sick in the bin and several others followed suit.
I think my teens clocked, at this point, that mal de mar might be on the cards.
So, to continue the metaphor, I showed my hand early. I whipped out the bag of “anti-nausea” lollipops the nice farmacia lady had sold me and we slurped on them like they were lifesaving medicine. Again, there might be a psychosomatic element to this but none of us were sick in the end. There were some close calls but we were OK. Good work, lollipops! I also banned the kids from looking down at their phones and made them stare straight ahead while seated, which is another trick I swear by. Look, I have experience, OK? I was a carsick child, a university student with a taste for cheap cocktails and an exhausted pregnant lady. Me and holding off the nausea are like that. I didn’t manage to procure any mint chewing gum or ice lollies, which are my other go-tos but these lollipops did the job.
And we didn’t just sit there in silence – there was a commentary from the guide and, in between points of interest, we played elaborate alphabet games and versions of “What Beats Rock?”. Around an hour in, we actually got to the point of the trip, which was to see dolphins and sure enough, we did.
What, you were expecting pictures? I was balancing precariously on the front of the boat when the dolphins were swimming past and I could barely stand up, let alone frame a decent photo. I took this one of the sea, which I swear had some dolphins in it, but even then I had to crop out a child vomiting next to me:
Nathan had a little more luck, taking photos from the windows on the side. Apparently there are pilot whales in this photo:
All of which is to say that sometimes, you just have to live in the moment. While it would have been lovely to get some amazing dolphin pictures for the blog, there was a risk that I would miss seeing them because I was faffing around with a phone and trying not to drop it over the edge. It was much more satisfying to just keep my eyes on the sea and watch them swim past.
And I do love dolphins. Don’t all 90s kids?
When the boat was stopped, it was probably also peak motion sickness time. We were getting battered around from side to side and I had to sit with my eyes shut and focus on reciting tube stations in my head. So while I got a good look at the dolphins, I missed out on the pilot whales a bit. But not as much as some unfortunate passengers, who had basically spent the entire trip with their heads in their hands. Weirdly, as soon as we were back in motion and powering back to shore, I felt fine. Fine enough to join in the tail-end of what was becoming a very surreal and existential “What Beats Rock?”
Incidentally, Reuben just put “Jet2 Holidays” into the site and apparently, there *is* something that can beat a Jet2 holiday. Rock, for one.
If it sounds like this was a small amount of pleasure for a lot of peril, then you’d be right. But it was nice to be out on the water and we saw a lot more of the island than we would on foot. We saw the volcano (Teide), albeit it from afar, and learnt a bit more about Tenerife than we would have just sitting around in the pool. But I was slightly relieved to get us all back on dry land.
After all that exertion, we had the perfect excuse to do nothing for the rest of the day except gorge on carbs at lunchtime to offset the earlier nausea. I even slept through cocktail hour that evening – it must have been all the sea air.
The rest of the holiday was mainly more swimming, sitting around and wandering along the beach at golden hour:
VK even began to swim on her own by the end of the week, which is a massive breakthrough for someone with so much swimming-related trauma. I’m still not ready to let her go solo on a waterslide though.
We also spent some time hiding in terror from resort mascots like Mr Balloonhead, with his strangler’s hands, and Skeletal Pooh:
But generally all went smoothly until the journey home. And even that wasn’t a disaster on the scale of our trip to Mallorca, where we were so late back that we’d had to check into a hotel in Crawley at 5am and stay there till lunchtime. No, these things are relatively minor but made us a little twitchy when we had a party to get to in Cambridge.
First, there was the transfer back to the airport which had a pickup window of 8:10-8:40 and didn’t turn up till 8:45. I was on hold to Jet2, listening to *that* song yet again by the time it lurched in. We made it to the airport with exactly two hours before the flight and cleared bag drop and security relatively quickly. Then we grabbed some Popeyes fries for VK and some crisps, water and headphones before going through another queue for Passport Control. The flight was 15 minutes late taking off, which is extremely good going by our standards.
However, a late take off runs the risk of missing our slot when landing and that’s exactly what happened. We landed at Stansted not far off schedule and then spent a very long time on the tarmac waiting for a gate to become available. Baggage Reclaim took an age and then we spent a while eating Leon fries, nuggets and burgers (vegan for VK) before buying some breakfast foods from M&S and getting to the car.
Not into the car, of course. No, that would depend on now having a flat tyre when we got back. Which we did. So once more, we were sitting on the tarmac at Stansted, this time inhaling lungfuls on manure-scented air, which didn’t sit that well on top of the Kimchi Fries I’d just devoured.
But all was well! The AA turned up, we had clear roads all the way to Cambridge and we got to the venue just in time for the first dance. As we left the airport, “Sit Down” by James was playing and we took that as a good omen that we would soon be dancing with our indie disco friends….to “Sit Down” by James, as it happens.
Minor catastrophises aside, it was probably our most successful holiday yet. Tenerife was beautiful and, for the most part, relaxing. There was also a woman who could spin a hula hoop on her arse. And that is a fitting end to this epic series of posts I think. Adios!
Now, I didn’t mean to make this holiday into two posts as it was really quite a straightforward week of lounging about. But turns out I can write a lot of words about that BAU lounging without getting on to the more chaotic and/or memorable bits that might be of interest to a wider audience. Fascinating as I’m sure you’d all found my cocktail list, it’s time to move on. Before I start listing ice cream flavours (Cream flavour? Who knew?)
Anyway, part of the Jet2 experience is that you get a rep who talks to you enthusiastically about excursions. We failed to make the appointment on our first day because…well, I can’t remember why. But we’d been at 2am the day before and life was still a bit hazy round the edges. But we had the brochure we’d been given on the coach and we had a few days out that we liked the look of. So, I tried WhatsApping the Jet2 team with some basic questions, like what age a “child” ticket would be for.
AI came back to me with some answers. Not necessarily the answers to my questions but answers nonetheless. Like “The child’s age is typically specified in the accommodation description page, and the child’s age on the date of return must not exceed the specified age.”
Err, thanks. Eventually, we gave up and just booked the excursions we wanted directly without the further help of the Jet2bot or any further funds going to buy him new diodes. Sorry, not in the Jet2 spirit, I know.
The first excursion was to Siam Park, which was a water park around 1km from the hotel. I looked at the route on Google Maps and couldn’t quite work out how to navigate the dual carriageway between the hotel and park on foot. So we found a taxi, which delivered us there for a mere 6Euros. I was a bit apprehensive about the whole thing because VK wasn’t a swimmer but it looked like there were options which would be safe for her. And also sealions, which everyone loves. The puppies of the sea!
Having pre-booked meant we could go almost straight in, despite the crowd at the gate and some confusing “VIP only” signage. It’s called Siam Park because it’s modelled on Thailand but “Born in the USA” blaring over the speakers ruined the illusion somewhat.
The good thing is, tho – sealions as soon as you walk in:
Aww, aren’t they just bebbies?
The other good thing is that the whole site is densely covered in trees, to emulate the jungle. That means that the paths between different areas are shady and don’t get too hot, even in the midday sun.
We headed first for the Coco Beach area, to find some lockers and relax a bit in the wave pool. The lockers part was more complicated than anticipated as none of them had keys in, so I thought they were all taken. But it turns out you need to pay for a key at the desk and then you can have it for the day. For a princely 10Euros. I’ll never complain about the price of the Legoland ones again.
The wave pool was a hit though, and there were loos and a snack bar nearby so we could have easily spent most of the day there. Roo was after some excitement tho, so we headed on.
On the way to excitement, we found Sawasdee, which I think was intended for tiny children but the un-tiny ones had a quick slide anyway. There’s a traffic light system for the rides, where Green is suitable for all, Amber more challenging and Red for the adrenaline rides. It was evident at the start of each ride what was what but it didn’t have the same coding on the map, which made life a little difficult. Roo wanted to try at least one Amber but VK was sticking to Green. Which was all fine but meant quite a lot of wandering around trying to suss out what was what.
We settled on the Mai Thai River as a ride which would probably be fine for all – it was billed as relaxing, so wouldn’t be too scary for the non-swimmer and we could go in a double ring to keep her close by. The queue was long but moved fast and we barely had time for one round of “obscure characters from Les Mis Guess Who” before we were at the front. Then it all got a bit hectic, trying to find places to put our shoes and phones and potentially find a life jacket for VK as well as sort out who was going in which ring. It wasn’t helped by the man running the ride shouting at me: “Lady! Pick up a ring and go!”
And when I say, “wasn’t helped”, I mean it was a near disaster. Nathan and I ended up in the double ring, drifting away down the river while VK – not famed for her love of being rushed or shouted at – was struggling to get into a single. It was far from relaxing.
Luckily she hadn’t had time to take her hat off so we could spot her from a distance and, after a while, it seemed like she was sorted. So I tried to relax and enjoy the ride but it was an anxious one, knowing that the non-swimming, panic-attack-prone child was miles behind us. And the ride itself seemed a bit chaotic, with frequent bottlenecks and rings trying to barge past each other.
Towards the end, a lifeguard intervened and sent Nathan and I down the fast lane while others were funnelled into a queue. We reached the end and got out, looking around for the kids. We swiftly found Reuben but where was VK?
I said this was a near-disaster earlier and I’m trying to keep it light so I’ll tell you now that the child was eventually found, mostly unharmed and only briefly dunked in the river. And I say this because I don’t really want to relive the bit between us emerging from the river and the point at which the four of us were finally reunited. After some running around, we established that a) VK was stuck in the queue, b) that the queue was for a conveyer belt that took the riders upwards and c) that the downwards bit was a fast-moving waterslide that almost certainly wasn’t suitable for a non-swimmer. In the confusion, Nathan ended up with all the phones so even after he had managed to intervene and pluck her from the water before the slide, there was no way for him to contact me or Reuben.
Trust me, that brief summary IS the skimmed-over version as the whole thing took about 45 minutes. Not that I’d know cause I didn’t have a phone. But I asked someone the time in the middle of the panic and piecing it all together from photos before and after, 45 minutes is about right.
Which is a long time to wonder whether your secondborn has been drowned or not. Anyway, she returned to us and we headed back to Coco Beach for some restorative fries and slushies. I could have done with something a heck of a lot stronger at that point, to be honest, but made do with a 7up which didn’t have any syrup in it….so just fizzy water. Then more lounging in the wave pool and more guessing of the ABC characters before any of us could even contemplate any more excitement.
What he had in mind was one of the Amber rides – the Naga Racers. This was basically a massive set of slides that riders go down headfirst on mats. Rather him than me. I left Nathan and VK in the gentle surrounds of The Lost City waterplay area and sat down in the shade while Roo queued. I think he was gone for around 30 minutes but not in the panic-inducing way that VK had been gone. I looked up just in time to see him whizzing down and, while he enjoyed it, he wasn’t keen to do it again. Instead, he went back to the Mai Thai River for a calmer ride than before and I joined Nathan and VK on deckchairs in the shade.
This probably doesn’t sound like a full day’s itinerary but by this point, the closing time was approaching. I bought some spring rolls at the little cafe near Naga Racers and some crisps and drinks for the kids and then we briefly stopped by Siam Beach before heading back to Coco Beach to pick up our things. I don’t think we made the most of our day, and the panic in the middle certainly threw us off course but both kids said there were things they’d enjoyed so it wasn’t a complete write off.
Plus, we saw the sealions again on the way out. And we found our way back across the dual carriageway so saved a few Euros on the cab. Hooray!
So, I’ve been on a Jet2 holiday. My children inform me that this is some kind of meme nowadays and I’d like to be able to say that we went the full week without ever hearing that jingle…but that would be a lie. Whether it was playing on the plane or from someone’s phone at the pool or just in my head, I felt a constant compulsion to take someone’s hand. Not permanently, you must understand.
That being said, it wasn’t at all bad. A lot of relaxing around the pool, a lot of eating and temperatures that were a happy 29-ishC with a cool breeze. The flights were more or less on time and the coach was relatively painless, as coach transfers go. I swore I would never set foot on a shared transfer again but something must have gone wrong in the booking process because that was apparently what we booked. But even that wasn’t too grim.
We were staying at the Alexandre Troya hotel, in Costa Adeje. We went for all-inclusive again this year because last year’s train odyssey had involved a lot of thinking about food, as well as everything else. My idea of a holiday is to think as little as possible and this certainly ticked the box. All I had to decide most days was which machine-poured cocktail to try when we went down to the snack bar without the kids in the evening. I think I got through the mojito, the tequila sunrise, the daiquiri and the piña colada. Happily though, there was no need to dance in the rain while drinking the latter. We had two double rooms so I was sharing with VK and Nathan with Roo….we weren’t quite neighbours but not far away. So really, the daily cocktails were just a way of giving the kids a bit of time to get ready for bed and chill out a bit without us around.
I’ll drop my annual holiday disclaimer in about now – whatever URL has brought you here, this isn’t really a blog about toddlers anymore. Roo is old enough that he’ll probably be drinking cocktails of his own in a couple of years and VK isn’t too far behind. So please don’t read this post and abandon your toddlers in a hotel room while you drink cocktails. LWAT is not responsible for anyone being irresponsible.
That said, I still WhatsApped them both the Jet2 advice on balcony safety before leaving them on their own. Like and subscribe for more top parenting tips.
Anyhoo, I got distracted by the booze for a moment them and forgot to tell you about the food, which is just as important if not more. There was a full buffet for breakfast, lunch and dinner and we could get hamburguesa, patatas fritas and helado from the snack bar if we happened to get hungry in between. It took a couple of days to work out some of the systems and some – like your room number being your order number – we only figured out on the very last day. But mainly, waving your room key card and saying “por favor” got you whatever you needed.
I’m constantly amazed by how much credit British people get for even attempting a bit of Spanish abroad – I never said anything more complicated than “I would like some chips please” but practically got a round of applause every time I rolled it out. I can’t imagine a Spanish person coming to London, expecting to conduct every interaction in their native tongue and then expecting credit for the smallest attempt at English. We British really are an arrogant nation, aren’t we?
Talking of Britishness, the dinner buffet had a different international theme every night. Again, we only clocked this late on so sadly think we missed “British Night” where, presumably, the main dish would be Soggy Roast and Regret. But Nathan and I enjoyed Mexican night, Chinese night and Italian night. The kids pretty much just had the same things every meal but they weren’t complaining. The ice cream was plentiful and the bread passed even VK’s exacting standards. And the great thing about an all-inclusive is that we’re not paying per food item so it doesn’t matter if they want to try a little of one thing and a wonton of the other. It’s so much easier to relax.
So I’ve told you a lot about the food at this one hotel in Tenerife, which may or may not be of use to the population in general. Next, let me tell you about some more very specific things before I get on to some information which might be of interest to more than just my family. First off, the swimming pools:
There were three swimming areas, two of which were kinda the same area. There was also a spa with a jacuzzi but that cost extra and it was 16+ so I would have felt bad about leaving VK out when the rest of us could go. The rooftop infinity pool was also 16+ but when I took Roo, a few of the patrons looked at us askance, as if he wasn’t supposed to be there. I think they forget what a 16-year-old looks like. So I only swam there twice. It was nice and peaceful but I’m not entirely sure what you’re meant to do in an infinity pool, as it seems to mainly be for posing. There wasn’t really much length to actually swim in so I think you’re meant to just lean on the edge and enjoy the view.
We spent most of our time in the two pools by the snack bar, where were decidedly not childfree. There was a decently deep section in one of them, along with a very shallow ledge and an ankle-deep area with pool loungers in it. I know, that was a new one on me too and I wasn’t convinced by the concept. It was a bit like sitting in a puddle and wasn’t nearly as comfortable as just floating in the water. If you do have toddlers and you’re heading to this hotel, I would add another warning here about the shelf – it’s not immediately obvious that it drops off to a much deeper section. There is a little splash pool that is far more toddler-friendly and the main pool has a more gentle incline so is probably safer.
We also spent a lot of time at the beach, which was just over the road from the hotel. It’s the usual deal where you have to pay 6Euro for a sun lounger but most of the time we were there to swim, not lounge so we just dumped our stuff on the sand or the rocks and put it in the Dock and Bay canvas bags if there was anything we wanted to keep less sandy. Being so close to the hotel meant we didn’t need to take any money or even phones with us – which was handy, as I could genuinely tell the beach sellers that I had no money to buy anything. Last I checked, they were not up for trading a giant sunhat for one of their sarongs.
The first day we went to the beach was just after we arrived – we got to the hotel at 12 and couldn’t check in till 2 so we had lunch at the buffet and then Roo and I went to the beach to paddle, as our swim stuff was locked in the luggage store. It was around 1 and the sand was so hot that it burnt my toes even with flip flops on – I don’t know if it was the metallic elements of the sand or just that it was the hottest part of the day. But it was so soft underfoot that every step scooped more burning sand onto my soles and that’s not something I’ve experienced before. So I invested in some mule-shaped sandals, which have a lot less flip and flop to them and they worked a treat for the rest of the holiday.
I also attempted a sunset swim one day, to try and avoid the hottest part of the day. But it was less “romantic swim” and more “getting smacked in the head by giant waves” so I didn’t try that again. The waves were fun during the day but were pretty intense in the evening. I read a description of Playa de Troya that mentioned “gentle waves” but trust me, there was nothing gentle about them.
We had much more success with our post-dinner walks, just wandering across the sand and posing like influencers in an infinity pool:
In fact, I bet you’re reading this and thinking that the whole holiday was just one success after another, right? Well fear not, I do have a bit of the LWAT chaos that you all love so much and I will share it in the next post. Now, there’s something to look forward to….
It seems that I have once more been the victim of Facebook advertising. Sooner or later I need to admit that it is *me* that is the problem, not Facebook. No one is forcing me to buy these tickets. All of which makes it sound like I didn’t enjoy Benjamin Button but I did. In a “stab to the heart” way, as VK described it. But I am aware that I probably shouldn’t book for every show that Facebook aggressively markets to me otherwise we’ll be living off nothing but Judes ice cream for the rest of our day.
So yes, all the “limited time”, “best new musical” stuff drew me in but also I saw some clips of the show and enjoyed the band-on-stage energy, which reminded me of “Hadestown”. Although they are very different in location and theme…but some of the “Hadestown” Orpheus numbers have a very Celtic feel and “Button” is much the same. It’s set in a Cornish fishing village and is a whimsical take on an age-old tale. It’s only when researching for this post that I realised that tale has the same author as “Gatsby”. I must tell VK.
But first, pizza.
For once, VK wanted something other than Five Guys for pre-theatre lunch. So we went to Pizza Express St Martin’s Lane for hot honey dough balls, garlic bread and BBQ Chicken pizza with vegan cheese for me. The pizza was better than normal vegan pizzas but not as good as a normal pizza, if that helps. I wonder why I never got into food blogging?
The theatre was only a few minutes’ walk away so we were in plenty of time, especially as we were in the Stalls and didn’t have a million stairs to climb like we usually do. On the steps down, there were some atmospheric fishing nets, with philosophical messages on them:
I’ve read this a few times and am still not sure whether it says “downs or clowns”. Both work, I guess. There were also newspaper front pages on the walls, which contained some spoilers for the plot. I won’t give anything away but I think I’m OK with this one:
In case you don’t know the story, the main character – Benjamin Button – is born as an old man and slowly ages backward throughout his life. I didn’t know how they were going to do this with just one actor (John Dagleish) but a combination of costume and body language took him from 70 to around 20 before the narrative is taken over by the ensemble. I was wondering throughout what the ideal age would be for an actor to cover this age range and it turns out he’s exactly the same age as me, down to the month of birth. Good to know I could play a 70-year-old if needed.
(Incidentally, if I get anyone’s name wrong you can blame the programme layout. While the childhood pictures of the cast are extremely cute, they are not the most helpful for matching characters to faces…!)
The idea of living life backwards is a compelling one and, at the start of the play, is handled more seriously than other adaptations of this story. Benjamin’s mother (Philippa Hogg) is devastated by the birth and sings a haunting refrain about the Kraken – one of the many oceanic themes pulled through the show. It all ends tragically, which is the first heart-wrenching moment of the show but there are many. Offsetting this tragedy though, are the musical numbers before and after her song. Just before the birth, we follow Roger Button (played by Damien James yesterday) as he walks through the village and greets the locals. Characters such as Little Millie Dyer and her gnome Gerald, Mr Gladstone and Mrs. Gladstone’s sister, drunken Miss Maureen Moncrief and many others appear as the ensemble introduce them and their various quirks. So the emotional impact of this unexpected man-child is all the more powerful for having come right after such a comical opener. But then just after “Kraken’s Lullaby” comes “A Little Life” where the now-59 Benjamin decides to escape from his attic room and get a taste for beer.
I explained all this in detail because it really sums up what the show is like – it swings from comedy to tragedy and back again with heartstopping regularity. There is a lot of joy in the show but the core concept is what VK described as “the psychological horror of knowing when you will die”. Still, Benjamin never dwells on this too much and instead sets about courting barmaid Elowen (Clare Foster).
Watching this show does involve a fair amount of mental arithmetic to try and work out how old the characters are meant to be at any one time. VK was particularly concerned with the problem of whether Elowen and Benjamin’s relationship was “age gap” or not. I eventually made her a spreadsheet to illustrate the years where it did and did not pass the “age of creepiness” test. It’s complex.
The lyrics really lean into this playing with numbers tho, with lyrics like “Benjamin Button requested just beer on precisely two hundred and four occasions” and “At precisely seventeen minutes past 8 p.m. on the 17th of December, 1918, Roger Button raised his hand and knocked loudly on the midwife’s door”. So it’s definitely one for all you maths fans out there. When I say “lyrics”, these were actually spoken over music. It’s hard to explain but with 70 years of life to cover, there was a lot of narrative and so a lot of the songs had these spoken interludes as well as traditionally-sung pieces. And when I say “music”, it is incredible. The cast all play instruments as well as characters so are narrating and acting while playing violins, cellos, trumpets, accordions and many, many more. How you can spin and sing while playing violin I don’t know but there are some seriously talented people on this stage.
I won’t name the whole ensemble as I’m bound to miss someone out but it is one of the best ensembles I’ve seen – they slip in and out of roles mid-song with amazing fluidity and sometimes quite unexpectedly. Nuwan Hugh Perera, for example, played Mrs Gladstone’s sister, in the show we saw and VK recognised him from “Ballet Shoes”. But you might have expected him to be Mr Gladstone, who was actually played by Oonagh Cox.
So there’s a lot of scenes that are played for laughs and some really heartwarmingly happy moments too, especially when Elowen and Benjamin finally reach the period of time when they’re both around the same age. They first get together, romantically speaking, on the eve of D-Day and they’re pretty similar ages until the late 1950s. But as the poignant song in the “Sandcastles” scene tells us, ” the tide is coming in”. This song is towards the start of the second half and it foreshadows the darker days to come.
I won’t spoiler the plot of the second act but it is a classic “Third Coconut” where things get really bad for the main characters before reaching some kind of resolution towards the end. VK says that it’s the bit with the teddy bear that really broke her and I can see why. She was in tears from pretty much then on and I wasn’t often far behind. She’s right when she says that the whole story is tragic and the end, while beautiful, was also painfully sad. Sandcastles as a recurring metaphor play a part in this last song and that’s the bit that really made me sob. Don’t go and see this show if you’re feeling fragile…or do if you want to have a good cry and not have anyone around you judging.
Maybe VK and I are just easy criers but wow, it packed a punch. The message of the show, though, was to make the most of the time you have. The opener says that “Time and Tide wait for no man” and if you need the key motifs of the show, they are right there. Time and Tide. Both ebbing and flowing.
Did we enjoy it? Yes, I did anyway. VK said afterwards “it was an amazing but if it had been less amazing, I’d be happier right now”. So whether that means she enjoyed it or whether she’s mad at me for putting her through such emotional turmoil, who knows? But that’s pretty typical teenagers, right? I bought her some green hair and a strawberry frappe (not to be consumed together) and that seemed to take the edge off.
The show is only on for a limited time, so if you do need to feel uplifted, entertained, wowed and also gut punched, it’s worth a visit. For tickets and more info, click here.
No disclaimer needed as I paid for this one. All opinions remain honest and my own.
Ah, Theatre Royal Drury Lane we meet again! You of the beautiful staircases and the name which makes for awkwardly long post titles? And where better to stage a Grecian epic than in somewhere with this carpet?
So it’s a suitably grand setting for a trip to Olympus and you certainly do feel like you’re climbing a mountain if your seats are in Row K of the balcony. But yknow, theatre is an expensive habit so we’ve gotta keep it affordable where we can. The view was decent, although we missed a few things that happened right at the back of the stage and we couldn’t see the backdrop at all:
I try not to read too many reviews of show before we see them but it was a bit unavoidable with such a high-profile opening and some surprisingly negative takes. I will say off the bat that I don’t agree with the negativity I’ve heard. It’s never going to be the most profound analysis of Greek mythology as it’s a Disney production – the aim is to be fun and entertaining and have songs that you go home humming.
And this play delivers on all fronts. It might help that I’m not overly familiar with the film, so some of the changes they made to the characters didn’t bother me too much. I know the soundtrack well, from the well-worn Disney compilations we used to play in the car, but my kids are the wrong generation to have watched this one obsessively. So yes, Pain and Panic are now inexplicably Bob and Charles and the old Satyr Phil is neither old nor a Satyr, despite the script repeatedly makes jokes about his age. We weren’t seeing Trevor Dion Nicholas but his role was ably filled by Ope Sowande. I feel like VK might make us revisit at some point because she does like to obsessively follow Hadestown alumni around London and it would be interesting to see if the bass vocals make the character seem older.
So a few bits there that might upset purists but I would challenge even the most sceptical reviewer to remain unthrilled by the booming prologue, the swirling cosmos effect and the glorious Mount Olympus staging. And that’s all before the Muses turn up who do, as many have noted, steal the show somewhat. I mean, they are incredible in visuals and vocals, with their nine different costumes and their complex harmonies. They cut right through the solemnity of Ancient Greece with attitude and energy and the audience loved them. If I had one criticism to make of this production, it would be that there are no gaps for applause. Every time the Muses appeared, there were people in the audience cheering and occasionally that meant we lost the first line of whatever was happening next. Now that the production has been running for a while, I’d imagine the director has a good sense of where these gaps need to be so maybe a few pauses would be helpful. The same thing happened at the start of some of the better-known songs but I realise it would be difficult to pause the show there.
I realise I didn’t tell you who the Muses are, so here you go – Candace Furbert as Thalia, Sharlene Hector as Clio, Brianna Ogunbawo as Melpomene, Malinda Parris as Calliope and Robyn Rose-Li as Terpischore. It would be hard to single one out for praise above the others as their power is as a group, in the way that they move and sing as one. But every Muse was fabulous and I hope they know that.
Of course I need to also talk about the title character, who was played by Luke Brady. We’ve seen him before in “The Prince of Egypt” so we knew he could carry a show. His Hercules is naïve, trusting and, as the song says, “the nicest guy”. He has a clear and powerful singing voice, which is best displayed in “Go the Distance”. It reached right to us in the back corner and his portrayal is very sympathetic. There’s not huge amounts of character development in the plot but he does the role very well. Mae Ann Jorolan as Meg has a lot more to work with and she portrays the light and shade in that character with finesse. You can see that she’s constantly conflicted, especially when she’s singing the iconic “I Won’t Say (I’m in Love)”. The costume choices for both Hercules and Meg are interesting and I don’t need to retread the same ground as other reviewers re that string vest but Meg’s costume worked for her character, even if it wasn’t as Grecian as some of the others. Hera, for example, had a very classical look but Meg was a lot more contemporary. Did I mention that VK had chosen the classic Disney Meg look for her theatre outfit?
While we’re on Hercules and Meg, I should mention the almost-duet “Forget About It” which I believe is a song written for the stage show as opposed to the film. In this, Meg complains about heroes who rescue women even if they don’t want to be rescued…and Hercules cuts through her complaints and takes the spotlight with his own whimsical musings about love. It works well to illustrate the difference between their characters and is a great comedy moment.
Talking of comedy, we need to discuss Stephen Carlile’s Hades, who I think has been unfairly maligned by reviewers for not being as scary as the film version. In his own words “why am I being made the bad guy just because I’m the bad guy?”. It is hard to recreate the terror of Disney villains in real life so, rightly, this production doesn’t attempt that and instead goes for campy evil. Which we are totally here for. This Hades is iconic, with the most amazing red coat and a great line in banter. When it comes to the final showdown between Hades and Zeus, I was kinda rooting for Hades. Some of the one-liners hit better than others – there is a bit of a “Dad jokes” vibe sometimes – but I really enjoyed this interpretation. Again, it would have been interesting to see Trevor Dion Nicholas encountering Hades when he was a Hades himself but it’s only a fleeting moment that Phil and Hades share the stage anyway. It is a very different character to the versions in either Hadestown or Kaos but all are equally valid. That’s the great thing about mythology – it can be interpreted in many different ways. It’s not like anyone in the audience knew Hades personally and can confirm whether or not he enjoyed a Dad joke.
Bob and Charles (Craig Gallivan and Lee Zarrett) also loved a gag – VK’s favourite was “I sleep with one arm under the pillow….it’s not my arm”. They might be different to their film versions but they are reliable comic relief and have great delivery of their lines. The whole show is full of humour – I did tell you this wasn’t going to be overly profound, didn’t I? But there is also heart and a bit of drama, albeit in a not-too-scary-for-the-littlies way.
And the staging is amazing. There are so many bits that happen inexplicably, like the moving columns. We discussed it in the interval and figured that they must be controlled from above but it’s seamless from an audience point of view. The sets and props are beautifully detailed – amphora vases shatter and logs break without the joins ever being visible. The “souls” effect in the underworld is also impressive and there is good use of the trapdoors in the stage that allow the Muses to appear and disappear magically. It has the feel of a very expensive production, with the Disney millions on display, especially during the finale when everyone on the stage has a shiny gold version of their costume. Whether it’s style over substance? Well, a little bit. But this matters not when it’s such an enjoyable experience.
So my conclusion would be that you need to leave your nitpicks at the door and accept that this is an interpretation of an interpretation of a myth. People who obsessively love the film may find things to criticse but there is also so much to love. It’s big and brash and gets very loud in parts but if you’re looking for quiet, reflective theatre you probably would not have booked this. It’s recommended for ages 6+ and that feels about right. There’s nothing too scary for small kids and the occasional adult joke will go right over their heads.
No West End night feels properly complete without a bit of time hanging around the street afterwards and it was a pleasant night to do so. From where we were standing, we could see the “Operation Mincemeat” stage door, where VK and I spent a much rainier evening recently. But it was warm and dry and we got to meet most of the main cast, which was a real treat. VK got her picture with Meg:
And four of the five Muses (but we got the programme signed by all five, plus Hades, Phil and Despina):
VK’s old-man back was causing her jip so we gave up before Luke Brady came out but, as ever, the actors were incredibly lovely and it was a real pleasure to meet them and be able to tell them how much we enjoyed it. We are very lucky to be able to do this so often but it makes the kids very happy. Thank you, “Hercules” cast. You are, quite literally, legends.
No disclaimer needed as I paid for this one but all opinions remain honest and my own. For tickets and more info, click here
I mean, not the City as in the Square Mile. That’s not a great place to spend any swelteringly hot days unless you’re inside an airconditioned office. Although I did see an exciting Superman-themed pop up booth outside Liverpool Street a few days back:
So what have we been up to while it’s been so ridiculously warm? Well, last weekend Reuben and I went to the open air pool at Oasis Leisure Centre for the first time since 2012. It was crowded but just about the perfect place to be when it’s 30c. There’s a sun terrace, which is only for the 16+ customers….Roo was about to turn back when he saw the sign before remembering that he was, in fact, 16. And the pool itself is gloriously cool. There’s also a little garden area and a sauna, not that we needed it that day.
Last time we went, we had a buggy and ended up changing in the disabled loo. This time I went to the very spacious ladies’ changing, which was a vast improvement. The lockers swallow coins but you can buy them from a vending machine in the reception area for 30p each (cash and card both accepted I think). A much smoother experience than doing the same trip with a newborn and a toddler. Funny that.
I obviously didn’t take any photos at the pool itself but here’s a Liptonice-themed bus we spotted at Spitalfields market afterwards:
Another refreshing find was a little beach in Docklands when I had a rare day without the kids. It wasn’t marked or anything but other people were paddling, along with an exuberant German Shepherd and some ducks. So I had a little paddle too. It’s near the cable car dock, in between Royal Victoria and West Silvertown. There are also some food trucks near the dock and I had a very tasty but messy Afghan chicken wrap. Luckily there was a handy Tesco so I could buy some wet wipes before even tackling it.
When I got back to HP, we had time for a cheeky Tiki at the Hulali Tiki Shack on our road before picking VK up. It’s not the only one we’ve had recently but it was very much needed after trekking around Docklands in the sun:
If you’re wondering why I was quite so footcooled and fancyfree, the answer is theatre. VK was at a Saturday rehearsal for her drama club show and Reuben was in some woods near Chesham, on a residential weekend with “Drama in the Woods”. He camped out for two nights, eating smores and being creative before taking part in a performance on the Sunday evening when the parents arrived for collection. It was co-run with friends of the blog Chickenshed so I recognised some of the leaders from various productions we’ve seen over the years and it was a lovely, inclusive group by all accounts. Naturally VK wants to go next year (it was for ages 14-17) – as she said “going feral and creating drama in the woods….what more could you want?”
Talking of friends of the blog, there’s something else I did recently that was both fun and “appropriately sad”. It was an event at Ivy House to celebrate the life of Becky, from Beanstalk Arts. She of the crazy bird puppets and the Britpop toddler discos. We gathered to play ukuleles, sing, shake shakers, hug, laugh and cry. A very fitting tribute to a lovely lady who left us way too soon. Our LWAT thoughts are with her family.
A sad note to end on but, as Becky herself said, appropriate. This post was about various warm weather activities and nothing was warmer than the love in that room. Rest well, slightly mad Becky.
Hooray! It is officially summer and you know that it’s official because ELSF are out in parks causing Bard-themed mayhem. For various complicated reasons, we weren’t able to go to the Highams Park dates this year so we decided to go to the Friday evening at Lloyd Park. And we weren’t only there to see the show – VK was effectively their support act, performing a monologue from the Scottish Play as a prelude to the main event. She’s part of their youth theatre, so it’s lovely of ELSF to find a way to include some of the students without having too many extra rehearsals (cause yknow, this kid is also in two other shows right now…there’s a lot of drama going on. Just to make a change)
Anyway, happy to say that she did very well, even if it wasn’t entirely clear when she’d finished her speech, But eventually she got a rapturous round of applause and settled down to enjoy the actual show with the rest of us.
Because she needed to be there early to rehearse, we had the opportunity to wander round Lloyd Park a bit. VK deemed it “all very whimsical”, even tho the water seems to be covered with algae. We bought chips for dinner from Five Star fish bar and them on a bench near the William Morris Gallery, which again was deemed whimsical:
We had raised our game in terms of seating this year and brought enough camping chairs for the four of us. They all fit in my shopping trolley, just about, but it definitely helped that Nathan gave us a lift. He dropped VK and I off and then he and Roo walked back down later. The thought of finding parking anywhere near Lloyd Park seemed a bit daunting so this was the most logical solution. And the outcome was that we got a row of four camping chairs, halfway back, and could enjoy the show in comfort. To be blunt, I had buggered up my knee earlier that day so comfort was pretty high on the agenda.
It was also pretty much perfect weather for outdoor Shakespeare. I know! After the sunburn of 2022, the storms of 2023 and the will-it-won’t-it of 2024, we finally had a show that was unambiguously perfect. Warm but not too hot, sun just dipping down behind the trees so there wasn’t too much glare (after the first few minutes) and no rain. Long may this continue!
credit: @marbleandskyphotography
So, onto the show itself. And after a few years of this there are some familiar faces. I’m pretty sure we saw Emilia Harrild as Juliet in the aforementioned storm of 2023. And Ursula Early is VK’s drama teacher so she’s a very familiar face but we’ve also seen her as the Nurse in 2023, Beatrice in 2024 and Olivia in 2022. Here they revive their nurse/Juliet dynamic as Rosalind and Celia although Rosalind is a very different character to Juliet and has a lot more agency over her life. If only Juliet had donned a flat cap and run away to the forest, her life might have turned out very differently.
The rest of the cast were – I think – new for 2025 although I’m prepared to be corrected on that. And it was the first time we’d seen a production with the community cast so that added an extra dynamic as well. As ever, there was something of a contemporary feel to the show, with added asides from the cast and some very modern tunes. I like to think that ELSF are slowly creeping forward in time – the first show we saw (“Twelfth Night”) was very 80s, “Romeo and Juliet” had a 90s kinda feel and this latest production had some songs from the noughties. Along with the emo-esque black and white stripes it felt like it could have been set around 2007. Which begs the question, which era do they go to for next year’s production? Is there any recognisable 2010s culture that could enhance a bit of the Bard? And the year after that, are they going to have caught up with themselves?
credit: @marbleandskyphotography
In this version, Rosalind is bit of an It Girl, being papped on the carpet and appearing in perfume ads. Orlando (Luke Martin) has the Walthamstow uniform of striped t-shirt and fedora. Charles the wrestler is gender-swapped to be Charlie (Blossom Timothy) and Touchstone (Ethan Dillon) is a hipster in shades and manbun, stealing nachos from an unsuspecting audience member during the speech about pancakes. With a smallish cast, there is obviously a lot of doubling up on roles so Blossom Timothy also plays shepherdess Phoebe and the singing role of Amiens. Ethan Dillon is the banished Duke Senior and Ursula plays servant Adam and country girl Audrey as well as Celia. Completing the cast are George Prové as Jaques, Duke Frederick and Corin, Charlie Jennings as Oliver and Silvius and apprentice actor Peggy Barnes as Le Beau, William and Jaques de Boys. Yes, there are two characters called Jaques in this play. I’m not saying Will was running short of inspo when it came to the cast list but he didn’t have the Mumsnet baby name forum to resort to when he was struggling. Oh, and a lot of the cast also play goats, which Nathan found hilarious, especially Kevin. They might be sheep now I think about it. Whatever they were, Kevin was a real scene stealer.
credit: @marbleandskyphotography
There are probably bits of this play that feels very familiar – when Jaques the First spits out the “Seven Ages of Man” speech, it’s a classic bit of Shakespeare that has little relevance to the plot but heaps of poetic symbolism. But some other parts of the play might feel less well-known – even Shakespeare himself might not remember every single sub-plot he included. I often think of “As You Like It” as the play that tries to go one better than all the others. Where “Midsummer Night’s Dream” has a triple wedding, this one concludes with a quadruple wedding. There’s so much plot needed to facilitate the ending that some of the relationships – Celia and Oliver, for example – get skimmed over very quickly in the script. It’s a credit to ELSF that they manage to cover all this ground in a version that’s just under two hours including an interval. It was pacey but didn’t feel overly rushed, at least no more than it does reading the original (“no sooner met but they look’d; no sooner look’d but they lov’d”…ah, if only life was that easy!)
The other way in which “As You Like It” tries to best MSND is with the gender swapping. Where MSND would have had a boy playing a girl playing a boy for Flute/Thisbe, here they’d have had a boy playing a girl pretending to be a boy pretending to be a girl. And this being Shakespeare, everyone is taken in. Anyway, I swore I’d stop nitpicking 400-year-old plays and I clearly haven’t so I’ll move on.
credit: @marbleandskyphotography
What I love about the ELSF productions is the pure mayhem of them. Even as characters are delivering Shakespeare’s lines at the front, other characters are walking away in a sulk muttering to themselves or distracting the audience by trying to eat their snacks (Kevin!). The characters use the space not only at the front, back and sides but also, on occasions, through the audience. Once again, an audience member was pressed into service to conduct a wedding and he looked suitably bemused. This is accessible Shakespeare – made relevant to a modern audience yet still retaining much of the original poetic language. Dance routines abound and the songs are sung heartily. As well as carrying the main weight of the plot, Emilia Harrild also added some cello to one of the numbers (who knew that was such a portable instrument?).
credit: @marbleandskyphotography
There are puppets and physical altercations and some beautiful visual effects, like this outfit of Jacques:
credit: @marbleandskyphotography
So even for the younger ones who might not pick up all the nuances of the different romances played by the same people in different hats (“Mincemeatcore”), there is always something to look at and always fun to be had. I think that’s true of all of the ELSF productions we’ve seen so far, even the one that was both a tragedy and extremely rainy. There’s just always something joyful about watching people who really love the material and aren’t afraid to play around with it a little.
There are some moments of intensity as well, such as when Duke Francis threatens Rosalind and this is played straight for maximum drama. But by the next scene, we’re hanging with the chill dudes of Arden and all is well again. Overall, this is one of the lighter plays but that’s perfect for the setting -I’m not sure how “Titus Andronicus” would work over an M&S picnic hamper. It is constantly entertaining and feels very swift on its feet. There is also a bar, which probably helps the audience to loosen up and enjoy the show. Lloyd Park also had toilets open at the café, which probably helped with the after effects of the bar.
I always recommend ELSF shows, even when they don’t feature my child, and I have no hesitation in recommending this one to you all too. It’s affordable, friendly and local (all of these things are huge pluses when your theatre kids are demanding shows on a weekly basis). This year there are more venues than ever and they’re exploring South-East London and North London as well as just the usual E postcodes. There is a full list here, along with all the info you might need. I can only hope the weather is as perfect for you as it was for us.
No need for a disclaimer as I paid for tickets but all opinions remain honest and my own.
I know, another day, another theatre review. This one was originally intended to be in July, after Roo’s exams had finished and as part of a Greek mythological double-bill with “Hercules”. But sadly, “Percy Jackson” changed its closing date so we had to go as late as we could while not missing the run entirely. With one exam to go, Roo said he reckoned he had enough spare time to take in a show…so that’s how we ended up seeing it on the penultimate day of the run. But it’s going on tour, so hopefully this is not a completely pointless review…just don’t turn up in Victoria expecting to see it.
That being said, let me tell you about a nice spot we found in Victoria. I remember the Cardinal Place shopping centre opening around 2004 and it was a fairly small and unremarkable spot. Now it seems to have its own tube entrance, which seems quite newly-opened. And when I say new, I really mean any time in the last decade or so:
The shopping centre also has a giant countdown to tomorrow in the middle, which I think is supposed to encourage you to make the most of the time you have (e.g. “Ten hours till tomorrow! You could drive to Aberdeen!”). I found it kinda unsettling, as it suggests that something bad is happening tomorrow and the best thing we could do would be to drive to the north of Scotland to avoid it. But we didn’t. We just went to the theatre instead.
First though, the nice spot I was talking about – the roof garden just above the ominous countdown. It’s right outside Five Guys, which would have been handy if we hadn’t just been to Pizza Express. But it was a very pleasant place to spend a kill a bit of time in. We sat in the shade, at the tables and chairs but there were full-on sun loungers as well.
And it was super handy for the theatre, which was just a few minutes’ walk away. It’s a modern building so a bit more accessible and well-planned than some of the historical places we’ve been to lately. It might not have the same charm as some of the older ones but the seats are more comfortable and the toilets are mercifully bigger. One day, I’ll do a full-on comparison between different West End theatres based on seat comfort and toilet availability. I certainly have plenty of data.
We also had surprisingly decent seats for once – I think we might have been upgraded when we got the date changed. We were in rows C and D so very close to the front, which was occasionally unnerving when the cast looked us right in the end. I think most seats would have a decent view though, because that’s the joy of well-planned modern theatres.
If you’re not familiar with the “Percy Jackson” series, here’s the basics – a boy discovers he’s part of a magical world and leaves his home to join her magical contemporaries. Yes, I realise this could reasonably describe a few different franchises but this version has a minotaur in it. And a cerberus, which always appeals to me. What could be better than a doggo with triple the heads to pet?
It has been made into a film franchise, which the kids have seen, and a TV show, which they’ve just started watching today. So would it work as a musical? Roo reckoned it did, as Percy often has an internal monologue and what is the next natural step other than putting those monologues to music?
Morgan Gregory plays the eponymous hero and he’s convincing as both an American and a teenager, despite being neither of those. He bears more than a slight resemblance to Tom Holland – which really helps with the high-school-to-hero trope – but at times he also reminded me of a young Hugh Dennis. His singing voice is powerful and he has the right kind of nervous energy for a troubled teen with ADHD. VK, as ever, was pleased to see more neurodivergent representation on stage (tho she said there was plenty of it in “Mincemeat” as well). Angus Benstead is suitably nerdy and skittish as Grover, while also exuding loyalty, and Lizzy-Rose Esin-Kelly as Annabeth is “true to the books” according to Roo, which is high praise indeed. She has a beautiful singing voice and some of my favourite moments where when she was harmonising with Kenedy Small (Clarisse).
There is some multi-roleing going on, although nowhere near as frantically as in “Mincemeat”. The actor for Luke (Xander Pang) also plays Ares and Vicki Lee Taylor as Percy’s mum Sally turns up in several other roles as well. I think there were twelve cast members in total, so a full cast compared to some others we’ve seen lately, and I’m not sure whether this is the same cast who’ll be going on tour or not.
The opening number sets out the whole premise of the story – that the children of Greek gods have issues. I don’t think anyone could argue with that. But it introduces Percy and Grover, along with their professor (Jazz Evans as Mr Brunner), who seems strangely well informed about Greek mythology. And then there’s the maths teacher, who seems even more strangely obsessed with Kronos. There’s a battle and suddenly Percy’s life is turned upside-down as he discovers his halfblood heritage and is whipped off to camp, fighting a minotaur along the way. We meet the manic Mr D (Joshua Lay), who is not living his life despite being the god of wine and good times as far as I recall.
I wasn’t sure how they would do the minotaur and it was a little conceptual but full marks for scale and the glowing red eyes. I should probably mention that there is quite some peril in this show, and it starts with a loud bang. The age rating is 8+ but even the teens jumped at that. Other effects included what appears to be real fire on stage and, towards the end, an ocean moment where the front few rows – including us – get sprayed with foam. Immersive theatre for sure.
The plot is changed a little in terms of the order of events and there are a few bits skimmed over but that’s perfectly reasonable to fit the book into a 2-hour show. “Capture the Flag” in the first half is a gritty highlight, as the campers attack each other in a seemingly sporting way and the first half finishes just as Annabeth, Percy and Grover set out on their quest.
At the interval, there was some confusion because the ice cream queue was right next to the door to the toilets and no-one seemed to know where to stand. But the ice cream selection was the familiar Judes and I went for mango sorbet this time. Nathan and VK both went for vegan salted caramel, which was a leftfield choice for people who aren’t dairyfree, and Roo went for vanilla. We ate in the lobby, enjoying the rare sight of interval daylight and also this spectacular staircase.
This might be a good time to say that Reuben might also be a halfblood of some kind because he does seem to be able to shoot rainbows out of his hands. Maybe that’s a power that’s only activated during the month of June.
The second half was packed with more gods, all of whom VK describes as “iconic”. Medusa also makes an appearance, who I believe my child described as a “girlboss” in a recent school assignment. The gods in this version are styled after rock stars, which fits with the rock-influenced soundtrack. Poseidon is a chill surfer dude – very different from his “Kaos” persona – and Kronos appears only as a booming voice in a pit. There is a twist at the end, which is signposted quite heavily from the Kronos scene but most people in the audience seem to be fans of the franchise already so I don’t think spoilers were a massive issue. When I say fans, I’m just judging by the sheer number of bright orange “Camp Halfblood” t-shirts on display. So I think the twist is supposed to be a surprise to the characters rather than to us as the audience. Around that same scene, the Thalia story is told and it’s done quite beautifully, with the image of a tree projected onto the character of Thalia. Was VK crying at this point? IDK. Probably.
As far as I remember, there isn’t too much deviation from the book and the songs move the plot along rather than adding unnecessary interludes. For example, one song takes the trio across America on their journey in true Muppet fashion. We ideally needed a map with a little picture of a car, but we got something close to that. I know it seems like every film is becoming a musical now but this story seems to fit the form well. You already need a fairly big suspension of disbelief at parts of the plot (Like how did Percy never notice Grover’s goat legs?) so it’s not much of a stretch for the characters to be bursting into song every now and then. Both of the kids have read the books and both enjoyed the show so I think it will please loyalists. And now fans outside London will have a chance to see it too! For more information on that, click here.
So an enjoyable afternoon out. It was possibly pitched a little younger than some of the shows we’ve seen lately but plenty for the teens to appreciate, especially as the characters are around their age. Hopefully Roo doesn’t have to fight a minotaur on his way into GCSE Physics tomorrow tho…
You’ll never guess what VK and I did last night….that’s right, yet more theatre. And there is more to come this weekend. “Op Mincemeat” was a bit of a last-minute plan as a friend got one of the lottery codes but the show had to be booked within a couple of weeks. And June is a busy month for us. So, we squeezed it in on a Friday night after work.
It was also incredibly humid when we left the house so we were dressed for summer but carrying raincoats. That would come in handy later. After a very stuffy Victoria line trip, we dived into the Starbucks near Covent Garden for exactly the same icy drinks as we had on our “Hamilton” ” trip.
The Fortune Theatre was only a couple of minutes’ walk away so we still got to our seats in plenty of time. I didn’t realise how tiny the theatre was – I used the word “diddy” to describe it to VK but she made an unfortunate joke about a 90s rapper that I don’t need to repeat here. It really is tiny, so no-one is too far from the stage. The only issue is that we were sitting under the balcony so, similar to the back of the worship hall at church, there seemed to be a bit of an issue with the sound. For a show where there’s lots of technical detail and everything is sung, it would have been good to have a bit more clarity. Especially as I wasn’t familiar with the plot. That’s just the shape of the room and the challenges of a 100-year-old space – I don’t think there was anything that could be done differently. But quibbles aside, we enjoyed it a lot. And the seats were not only much more comfortable than “Gatsby” but they were also in VK’s current favourite colour – cerulean.
If, like me, you’re not familiar with the plot of this show it is this – a group of intelligence officers are looking to change the course of World War II and come up with an absurd plan to do so. It’s good to see the back office intel function getting a bit of the spotlight for once. The whole show is performed by five actors, who often change costume on stage to save time. As the programme says, there are a lot of hats involved. If that sounds confusing, trust me – it can be. But it doesn’t matter too much.
The opening of the show sets out the company’s view on rank and privilege quite clearly – it’s about the public school boys who somehow seem to be in charge, despite being unqualified. Make of that what you will. Then the plot develops as the wacky proposal by the resident geek (Charles Cholmondeley, played by Peter McGovern) turns into reality, enabled by the suave Ewan Montagu (Alex Young). Montagu has no ideas or ability to make detailed plans but he has confidence and charisma and that is sometimes what matters.
The programme bills each actor as having a primary character as well as “others” and you soon lose track of how many extra characters each one is playing. The three other primaries are the ambitious secretary Jean Leslie (Roshani Abbey), the buttoned-up Hester Leggatt (Danny Becker) and the authoritative Johnny Bevan (Chlöe Hart). Between them, they are on stage almost constantly for the 2 hour plus runtime and do all the singing, dancing and set changes. It’s head-spinning.
The plot itself is intriguing and a lot of it is absolutely true, right down to Ewan Montagu eventually writing a screenplay about it. The premise seems unlikely – dropping a corpse onto mainland Europe with fake invasion plans about his person – but it all happened and, even more unbelievably, actually worked. That might be a spoiler but you know we won the war, right? Plus, as VK pointed out, there is a song in the song list called “We Did It”, which tells you that is all works out fine.
But along the way, there is certainly a lot of jeopardy and curveballs, such as an unwanted plane crash involving the most American American to ever set foot on the West End stage. There are fallouts and suspicions, including something that I still would consider to be something of a data breach. Some details do get a little glossed over, such as the ethics of the whole thing but this isn’t intended as a deeply thoughtful piece – it’s a fun, frothy musical about some very unlikely subject matter. Hence the KPop-style Nazi opener of Act 2, which bears no relevance to the plot and is what VK calls “the unfortunate 12-year-old-boy anthem”. It took me a while to realise that she mean it was the anthem that was unfortunate, not the 12-year-old boys. And not the specific 12-year-old boy she bangs on about most of the time. Anyway, that was a bit of an oddity but definitely indicative of a show that does not take itself seriously.
There are some more emotional moments though. “Dear Bill”, as sung in falsetto by Danny Becker is a very moving song in the midst of the chaos. And the bit right at the end when they talk about the true identity of the corpse had VK in tears. Not that that is difficult.
Most of the time though, it’s surreal jokes about newts, physical comedy, dance routines and, of course, hats. There is the odd anachronism – I don’t think they had sudoku in the 1940s – but also a few fourth-wall breaks and a bit of laughing on stage. So, as intricate as the world-building is, they are not too precious about it.
It’s hard to pick out one cast member of the five for praise as they all do such an amazing job with the frantic multi-roleing. I believe Chlöe Hart is the longest serving cast member and she certainly seems to have a natural authority which comes from knowing the play so well. It definitely feels like she could do this all by herself if needed. That makes her a great fit for Johnny but her turn as Ian Fleming is also impressively flamboyant. Alex Young has great charm as Ewan and a lot of energy, especially in the “Just for Tonight” sequence. Peter McGovern as Charles is suitably nervy and paces around the stage like a twitchy puppy but it’s good to see him break out into a more confident character (“Tub”) for a few moments at the end. Roshani Abbey has a great belt when she’s singing and shows a real vulnerability with the character of Jean as well. And then there’s Danny Becker playing everyone from Hester to Willy to the sinister Spilsbury and showing great versatility with it. Spilsbury was one of VK’s favourite characters though – I think the cape was “very yassss” as these youngsters say.
Oh, and just to say – if you get annoyed at gender-blind casting then this is NOT the show for you. But if, like VK, you’re fond of a bit of tailoring on people of all genders then you’ll be fine. It is a particularly straightforward one to cosplay as well:
Given that I knew nothing of the plot other than a vague explanation from the child on the way in, I enjoyed it a lot. The only song I knew previously was “Sail On, Boys” because it was all over the socials earlier this year and it is not at all typical of the other songs. The fact that this song exists in the same show as one called “Glitzy Finale” suggests that there is really quite a wide variety of musical styles. And the finale was indeed VERY glitzy, and full of surprises.
You know what’s lacking variety? The choice of vegan ice creams in West End theatres. I had vegan salted caramel once again but would love a different variety of Jude’s at some point. I should probably also report back on the toilets, which were the tiniest I’ve been in since “Kathy and Stella” but that’s to be expected, right?
So does it live up to the hype? I reckon so. It’s quirky, individual and has a very British sensibility so it’ll be interesting to see how it plays on Broadway. It’s definitely worth entering the lottery as full price seats are pricey but my friend who gifted us the code seems to win on a semi-regular basis so it’s not impossible to win.
As is now traditional, VK wanted to go to the stage door. I mentioned earlier that it was humid day and what comes after a humid day? That’s right, thunderstorms. I already knew I would regret wearing flipflops but I was grateful for having grabbed a slightly clammy raincoat on the way out. It was one of our less pleasant stage door experiences, but only in terms of the weather. The actors were absolute sweeties and we appreciated them all the more for coming out in such horrendous weather to sign. Especially when some of them (Danny) were, like me, dressed for summer. We didn’t chat much as we didn’t want them to catch pneumonia but we managed to say hi to four of the five, which was great. VK was beaming over her late-night Five Guys.
Since I started writing this post, I have seen a whole other show so am now writing a show behind and should probably wrap things up. So I’ll just leave you with the link for tickets and a most important piece of MI5 wisdom – “Horses can’t inherit”.
