So, I’ve been on a Jet2 holiday. My children inform me that this is some kind of meme nowadays and I’d like to be able to say that we went the full week without ever hearing that jingle…but that would be a lie. Whether it was playing on the plane or from someone’s phone at the pool or just in my head, I felt a constant compulsion to take someone’s hand. Not permanently, you must understand.
That being said, it wasn’t at all bad. A lot of relaxing around the pool, a lot of eating and temperatures that were a happy 29-ishC with a cool breeze. The flights were more or less on time and the coach was relatively painless, as coach transfers go. I swore I would never set foot on a shared transfer again but something must have gone wrong in the booking process because that was apparently what we booked. But even that wasn’t too grim.
We were staying at the Alexandre Troya hotel, in Costa Adeje. We went for all-inclusive again this year because last year’s train odyssey had involved a lot of thinking about food, as well as everything else. My idea of a holiday is to think as little as possible and this certainly ticked the box. All I had to decide most days was which machine-poured cocktail to try when we went down to the snack bar without the kids in the evening. I think I got through the mojito, the tequila sunrise, the daiquiri and the piña colada. Happily though, there was no need to dance in the rain while drinking the latter. We had two double rooms so I was sharing with VK and Nathan with Roo….we weren’t quite neighbours but not far away. So really, the daily cocktails were just a way of giving the kids a bit of time to get ready for bed and chill out a bit without us around.
I’ll drop my annual holiday disclaimer in about now – whatever URL has brought you here, this isn’t really a blog about toddlers anymore. Roo is old enough that he’ll probably be drinking cocktails of his own in a couple of years and VK isn’t too far behind. So please don’t read this post and abandon your toddlers in a hotel room while you drink cocktails. LWAT is not responsible for anyone being irresponsible.
That said, I still WhatsApped them both the Jet2 advice on balcony safety before leaving them on their own. Like and subscribe for more top parenting tips.
Anyhoo, I got distracted by the booze for a moment them and forgot to tell you about the food, which is just as important if not more. There was a full buffet for breakfast, lunch and dinner and we could get hamburguesa, patatas fritas and helado from the snack bar if we happened to get hungry in between. It took a couple of days to work out some of the systems and some – like your room number being your order number – we only figured out on the very last day. But mainly, waving your room key card and saying “por favor” got you whatever you needed.
I’m constantly amazed by how much credit British people get for even attempting a bit of Spanish abroad – I never said anything more complicated than “I would like some chips please” but practically got a round of applause every time I rolled it out. I can’t imagine a Spanish person coming to London, expecting to conduct every interaction in their native tongue and then expecting credit for the smallest attempt at English. We British really are an arrogant nation, aren’t we?
Talking of Britishness, the dinner buffet had a different international theme every night. Again, we only clocked this late on so sadly think we missed “British Night” where, presumably, the main dish would be Soggy Roast and Regret. But Nathan and I enjoyed Mexican night, Chinese night and Italian night. The kids pretty much just had the same things every meal but they weren’t complaining. The ice cream was plentiful and the bread passed even VK’s exacting standards. And the great thing about an all-inclusive is that we’re not paying per food item so it doesn’t matter if they want to try a little of one thing and a wonton of the other. It’s so much easier to relax.
So I’ve told you a lot about the food at this one hotel in Tenerife, which may or may not be of use to the population in general. Next, let me tell you about some more very specific things before I get on to some information which might be of interest to more than just my family. First off, the swimming pools:
There were three swimming areas, two of which were kinda the same area. There was also a spa with a jacuzzi but that cost extra and it was 16+ so I would have felt bad about leaving VK out when the rest of us could go. The rooftop infinity pool was also 16+ but when I took Roo, a few of the patrons looked at us askance, as if he wasn’t supposed to be there. I think they forget what a 16-year-old looks like. So I only swam there twice. It was nice and peaceful but I’m not entirely sure what you’re meant to do in an infinity pool, as it seems to mainly be for posing. There wasn’t really much length to actually swim in so I think you’re meant to just lean on the edge and enjoy the view.
We spent most of our time in the two pools by the snack bar, where were decidedly not childfree. There was a decently deep section in one of them, along with a very shallow ledge and an ankle-deep area with pool loungers in it. I know, that was a new one on me too and I wasn’t convinced by the concept. It was a bit like sitting in a puddle and wasn’t nearly as comfortable as just floating in the water. If you do have toddlers and you’re heading to this hotel, I would add another warning here about the shelf – it’s not immediately obvious that it drops off to a much deeper section. There is a little splash pool that is far more toddler-friendly and the main pool has a more gentle incline so is probably safer.
We also spent a lot of time at the beach, which was just over the road from the hotel. It’s the usual deal where you have to pay 6Euro for a sun lounger but most of the time we were there to swim, not lounge so we just dumped our stuff on the sand or the rocks and put it in the Dock and Bay canvas bags if there was anything we wanted to keep less sandy. Being so close to the hotel meant we didn’t need to take any money or even phones with us – which was handy, as I could genuinely tell the beach sellers that I had no money to buy anything. Last I checked, they were not up for trading a giant sunhat for one of their sarongs.
The first day we went to the beach was just after we arrived – we got to the hotel at 12 and couldn’t check in till 2 so we had lunch at the buffet and then Roo and I went to the beach to paddle, as our swim stuff was locked in the luggage store. It was around 1 and the sand was so hot that it burnt my toes even with flip flops on – I don’t know if it was the metallic elements of the sand or just that it was the hottest part of the day. But it was so soft underfoot that every step scooped more burning sand onto my soles and that’s not something I’ve experienced before. So I invested in some mule-shaped sandals, which have a lot less flip and flop to them and they worked a treat for the rest of the holiday.
I also attempted a sunset swim one day, to try and avoid the hottest part of the day. But it was less “romantic swim” and more “getting smacked in the head by giant waves” so I didn’t try that again. The waves were fun during the day but were pretty intense in the evening. I read a description of Playa de Troya that mentioned “gentle waves” but trust me, there was nothing gentle about them.
We had much more success with our post-dinner walks, just wandering across the sand and posing like influencers in an infinity pool:
In fact, I bet you’re reading this and thinking that the whole holiday was just one success after another, right? Well fear not, I do have a bit of the LWAT chaos that you all love so much and I will share it in the next post. Now, there’s something to look forward to….
