Dopamine Land – 03/08/24

Posted on August 3, 2024 by katese11

I seem to have a bit of a curse at the moment where I’m writing about things no one will soon be able to go to. As soon as I reviewed Fox in a Box, they announced they were closing. I went to a Club de Fromage daytime party shortly before they revealed that they were stopping everything *except* the daytime parties. And now I’ve finally got round to going to Dopamine Land just a week before the doors shut forever. Still, if you’re at a loose end in the next week or so you know where to go!

Dopamine Land is just next door to Accidentally Wes Anderson so the nearest tube is South Kensington. We have a well-worn route to South Ken that unfortunately wasn’t viable today, due to both the Overground and the Piccadilly Line having closures. So instead it was a bus to Walthamstow, tube to Victoria and then an awkward change on an overcrowded Circle and District line platform. I stand by what I said about Victoria station being full of tourists who have no idea where they’re going.

Still, I’d accounted for at least some of these complications and left time for things to go wrong, especially in light of the patchy buses and lack of trains we’ve suffered for weeks now. So we got to South Ken with a clear hour to spare and decided to hang out in a Pret that’s considerably larger than the Petit one inside the station.

If you haven’t heard yet, the Pret subscription is changing in September so don’t worry – this non-stop advertising will soon cease. Pret and I have decided to see other people. A conscious uncoupling, if you will.

While having coffee, I started thinking about the logistics of being in a ball pool when neither Eva nor I had socks on and whether we’d be told off. So I nipped back across the road and managed to secure two pairs of socks from Cards Galore in the station arcade at a reasonable-ish price. Plus, they have Highland Cows on which is a bonus.

All of which preparation brings us to Dopamine Land itself. You’re greeted several times as you go through – once in reception then once in this room full of neon frames:

This is a bit of a holding area where you can put bags into the cloakroom and use the loo (through the bar area but you’re told not to get too distracted by it) and then sent through to the experience itself once the group in front has moved on. As a starting point, it can feel a bit too curated like you’re going to be monitored at every stage but everyone is friendly so it’s not a problem. The first room is a timed experience – one of only two – so that’s why the first part is carefully managed but there’s a lot more freedom to wander at your own pace after that first room.

The first room is quite special though, and it’s the one which appears on all the posters. You can see why:

You can also see why it’s timed once you’re in there as it’s a very small, enclosed space and could get claustrophobic once those doors are shut. The time went by very quickly but we got a few photos:

Next up was the musical squares room. We didn’t quite work out how the music was working but basically you jump on squares as they light up to create a tapestry of sound and light. It’s fun although quite dark so none of my photos really worked. This one does look kinda like a 90s music video though:

It is quite a full-on sensory experience so some people might find it overwhelming but Eva was fine, even with her noise sensitivity. The corridors in between are also quite dark and the neon, combined with the ambient noise, gives it a bit of an eerie Stranger Things vibe. That’s not a bad thing but it might be worth keeping younger kids close if they’re easily spooked.

From there, a couple more rooms that were a bit more low-key so a bit of breather after two quite intense ones. The writing room is getting really quite full up now so it was hard to find a blank space to add to and I must have leant on the wall at one point because I seem to have writing on my arm.

Nathan climbed on the stool and wrote on the ceiling – I’m not sure whether that was the intention but other people had clearly done it before him.

Reuben wrote “The Game” of course but you sadly can’t really make it out. Luckily, it’s been immortalised in lego and on a bracelet this week so we won’t forget those words too easily. Eva also wrote it on the sand in Margate but that might have been washed away by now.

The other room was the lucid dreaming room but that was a tad underwhelming – just some mirrors and video and I wasn’t quite sure how to interact with them. I might well have missed something.

We’d caught up with the group in front in the writing room and the group behind ours had caught up with us so there was a bit of a bottleneck going in to the ball pool area. The idea is that you go to the story cave first – which has fridge poetry and shadow puppets – and then the waiting area to take your shoes off. With a few groups going in different directions there was a bit of confusion and the possibility that the family coming up behind us might overtake. Credit to the guy in charge of that area though – he sorted us all out and everyone went to the ball pool and then the fire lantern room in order. We shared the ball pool with the group of two behind us but that was fine…there was plenty of room.

I didn’t get many pictures as I didn’t want to lose my phone in the balls but you get the idea. We lost Eva under the balls a few times but we recovered her in time to get back to the waiting room.

Then we chilled out for quite a long time in the fire lantern room. It’s spacious and calming and there are lots of mats to lie down on so we did just that. It’s the kind of play facility I longed for when the kids were little….”now children, here’s a room where we all lie down and do nothing. It says we have to on the wall”.

Again, my pictures are pretty ropey because it was so dark but it was a nice, relaxing experience. As was the next room – the forest:

We hung out there for a while until it got a bit crowded and we moved on to the final room before the bar area…the Pillow Fight room. This is quite a shocker after two nice calm rooms…the lights are flashing and there is “Set You Free” by N-Trance on repeat. I think this juxtaposition of quiet and loud is deliberate and meant to get you used to the transition back to the real world. Or maybe it’s just meant to put you in an aggressive mood for pillow fighting, which must have worked cause we ganged up on Nathan and beat him to the floor, Lord of the Flies-style.

And then we went for a lovely bubble tea in the bar area. You really do go through the full range of happiness-related emotions in this place. Happiness at sitting in a nice room and sipping on passionfruit and blackberry bubble tea (or Coke for the boys) just after the happiness of getting your aggression out by walloping each other with pillows.

There are a few more photo opportunities in the bar area as well, while you enjoy your drinks so of course we took them all.

The experience takes around an hour plus time at the bar, so it was about half past four by the time we were ready to leave. Ridiculously early  – in my opinion – for dinner so I suggested a short walk to a different branch of Five Guys. This might be because the South Ken branch is always crowded but also just to spin the day out a bit longer before we had to tackle the homeward journey.

So we set off up Queen’s Gate and found the newly renovated Wildlife Garden at the Natural History Museum. At least, I think it’s newly reopened – it was closed off when we were there in January. I’d hoped we could wander along the path and it would take out a bit of the route but the north end doesn’t link back up to the street so we had to retrace our steps.

Still, it was a very pretty and soothing diversion and it’s amazing how wild it feels considering it’s right in the middle of London. There was also a dog statue on top of one of the buildings:

We took a similar diversion at the top of Queens Gate, to walk west through Kensington Gardens instead of along the road. We saw a dog fountain on the way, which Eva had to stop and pet:

And a rainbow of plants, including a very goth front row:

We also saw a trapeze training school which was impressive but terrifying looking. Eva was not overly keen to sign up and I can’t say I blame her but kudos to the students – we stopped to watch one trapeze trainee and she had mad skillz. I didn’t get a photo of her in action but you can trust me on this one.

Fearful of having to double back again, I cut back to the road way too early – just by the coffee kiosk – when we could have walked through right up to the end of the gardens. Eva had clocked by this point that the short walk was longer than I’d made it sound but luckily we were now in sight of Kensington High Street and I could assure her that Five Guys was within reach. I was a little distressed to find out that my old branch of Clarks was now an Itsu but I guess times change and sushi might be more popular than sandals now. If only someone had thought to combine them and open up a sushoeshop.

Luckily, I was not wrong about Five Guys. And they even had their very own rainbow to greet us with:

Despite some confusion at Kensington High Street tube (where *do* you get the District line towards Upminster from?) we had a smooth journey back, with Vic line spookily quiet for a Saturday afternoon and the bus turning up after a fashion at Walthamstow. A successful day out!

Dopamine Land is open until 11th August. For tickets and more info, click here

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“Kathy and Stella Solve a Murder” at Ambassadors Theatre – 17/07/24

Posted on July 20, 2024 by katese11

Now, there’s no starker realisation that the toddler years are over than when you take your baby girl to see a show and she is laughing uproariously at a well-placed F-bomb in the first scene. There are many well-placed F-bombs in this show, including one that’s backlit and giant as part of a hashtag so I would emphasis the age rating – 12+ – and gently nudge anyone who’s after proper toddler content towards Tales From the Shed or Little Angel Theatre.

That disclaimer out of the way, I’ll go for another, which is that I booked this on a whim because I could not get the trailer song out of my head. So I gave in to advertising and hoped it would stop me singing it. Spoiler: It did not.

So I really wasn’t expecting much. Our seats were £20 each and advertised as “restricted view” so I wasn’t even sure whether we would see anything. I told Eva that, given it was a show about a podcast, then we could always just listen to it like a podcast and not worry too much. As it turned out, we could see most of the action apart from one rather vital bit towards the end but we did have to lean back a bit and look up. If we looked straight ahead, this would be our view:

We were also right by the speakers, so some bits were a little loud but there were advantages too. A surprise character in the second half popped up almost in front of us  – I won’t spoil the surprise by saying who the character was but Eva described their outfit as “iconic”. And we got a few stray winks off the lead actors plus a cardigan pocket full of confetti. That’s pretty much the front-row-for twenty-quid experience….a crick in the neck but a few souvenirs too. And legroom! All balances out.

If you haven’t seen the trailer and aren’t familiar with the concept of the show, it’s about two best friends who have a true crime podcast and aspire to become “true crime famous”. But then they become embroiled in a real-life murder and have to solve it before their own lives are in danger. If you think this sounds a bit like “Only Murders in the Building”, then you’d be right. I’m not sure which came first but the basic concepts and dynamics are very similar. However, where OMITB is very NYC, KASSAM is KUH. That’s Kingston-Upon-Hull or just Hull for the fans. In fact, it’s so Hull that there’s a chance that tourists might not be offended by the swearing because they don’t have any idea that it’s a swear word. Thanks to going to university in Reading with Roast Dinners in London, I am more than familiar with Hull-tinged swearing. And yes, I was very pleased when Kathy of Kathy and Stella revealed that she also went to Reading Uni, even if her experience wasn’t too positive.

Not as excited as I was to see her “Once More With Feeling” mug though. There were three references to Buffy in the show and all of them made me happy but that more than anything.

I know I’m focusing on the small details before I get to the big picture – mugs, accents, outfits – but isn’t that the forensic way? Look at the small details and build up an intelligence picture. We’ll get there.

First though, a few of the themes….at its heart, this is a show about female friendship. You know that any pair of friends who swear undying devotion to each other at the start of a show are gonna fall out about halfway through (just in time for the third coconut) and then make up by the end. That happens here, and it’s a fairly predictable arc about growing up, growing apart and finding a new way to relate. But that’s all fine…from that familiar trope, layers of character and murder-based humour are piled on to make it into something new. When Kathy sings that “if I didn’t have you, I’d die” she mimes someone disembowelling her in gruesome fashion. Stella, the less emotional one, is more non committal about the whole thing and wraps her sentimentality up with a sneaky Rickroll.

Another theme is neurodiversity. In the same song, Stella says “I hated pretty much everyone/’Til I found someone who hated everyone too”. They’re outcasts and nerds – Kathy the flower child and Stella the rock chick – but they’ve found each other and a way to channel that nerdiness into something productive. They have anxiety (Kathy) and dyspraxia (Stella), both of which Eva strongly relates to and it’s good to see some positive representation…..acknowledging the struggles of anxiety but not overdramatising it.

The third theme is the fickleness of pop culture, which is also explored in another of Eva’s favourite murder musicals – “Chicago”. Kathy and Stella start out as fangirls themselves before discovering that their idol isn’t all she’s cracked up to be….and later they briefly become the celebrities themselves. It’s a show that’s made for the internet age, where everything is polarised and turns around quickly. The aforementioned giant hashtag illustrates that nicely and it’s summed up in the song “Approval of Strangers” where Stella sings “From this point I can’t see any danger/in rooting all my self esteem/To the approval of strangers”

But I’m aware that all of this makes it sound very earnest, which it really really isn’t. It’s all handled a bit tongue-in-cheek with lots of sly winks to the audience and fourth wall breaking. The dance numbers are gloriously over-the-top, with the theme song performed in spinning office chairs that come dangerously close to the edge of the stage when you’re sitting just in front of it. A storyline that looks like it’s turning into a love story takes an abrupt turn when Kathy falls in love with the morgue itself, not the man in it, and celebrates atop an autopsy trolley. I’m glad that love story didn’t go anywhere because the actor was also playing Kathy’s mum so it was all getting a bit Oedipal.

The props were similarly over-the-top with not just the confetti but also those giant foam fingers you get at American sports games but they’re all holding murder weapons. There’s crackling energy throughout, even though the seven actors are frantically multi-tasking and constantly diving off the stage only to come back seconds later as a different character. There are red herrings galore and the final reveal – which was the key moment we couldn’t quite see from our seats – was less important than all the build up around it. And, of course, the inevitable escape after it. They’ve been preparing for a hostage situation all their lives, don’t ya know?

Eva laughed a LOT and was quoting it all the way home. She’s now developed what I believe the young folks call a headcanon but we don’t need to go into that. I didn’t see anyone else there in the tween age range but it was a school night so more young people might want to go now it’s school holidays. As long as you don’t mind the swearing, it’s perfect for your nerdy tweens – joyous, funny, modern but with a classic whodunnit theme. See you next murder!

“Kathy and Stella Solve a Murder” is on at the Ambassadors Theatre until 14th September. For tickets and more info, click here

No disclaimer needed as I paid for this one. All opinions remain honest and my own though.

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This is London…with a teenager

Posted on July 13, 2024 by katese11

This is the shocking post you’ve all been waiting for. This blog turns 13 today, on 13th July and in honour of that milestone, I am renaming the blog once and for all.

Welcome to….London With a Teenager

The mathematically-inclined among you will have figured out the reason for this dramatic change. If I had a toddler in July 2011 then it kinda stands to reason that I now inexplicably have a giant GCSE student. And an almost-as-giant tween coming up to take the mantle in a year or so.

It’s not like I haven’t dropped some hints over recent years. Things like sword fighting and escape rooms aren’t classic toddler activities and I can’t remember the last time either of my kids set foot in a sandpit. I still love a paddling pool on a hot day though.

So that’s my way of saying that nothing’s really changing except for the header image and a new URL that basically just points back to the old one. Thank you to all my loyal readers – I know a lot of you now also have secondary-school aged kids so do stick around. There might be something to help wit all those long summer weeks that are stretching ahead of us….

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“Much Ado About Nothing” by East London Shakespeare Festival – 08/07/24

Posted on July 8, 2024 by katese11

This is our third visit to an ELSF production in Highams Park. The first year was “Twelfth Night” in blazing sunshine, to the point that we were having to create shade for the kids to sit in:

Last year was “Romeo and Juliet” and it was a little damp around the edges:

What would it be this year? As we sat on the train home from church, watching the torrential rain, I wasn’t feeling optimistic. Neither was I as I dashed home to grab umbrellas and camping chairs while Roo babysat my halloumi fries in V’s Burgers. But we were hardened Shakespeare goers and Eva is now a part of the ELSF youth theatre so we were determined to be supportive, whatever the weather.

The unlikely outcome is that the rain stopped on the way up to the lake and only resumed at the curtain call. I know! I wasn’t expecting that either. We didn’t have anything that would prepare us for hot weather  – no suncream or cold drinks – yet here we were in sun-soaked Messina, as promised by the promotional material. I must admit I had said a few times I was expecting it to be soaked-soaked than sun-soaked but in answer to Beatrice, yes I will eat my word. Here’s how it looked just before the start of the show:

And apart from a few light spots of rain during the first wedding scene, the sun carried on throughout. We did not use the umbrellas and we did need cold drinks in the interval. I take it all back.

© YIODA NICHOLAOU

So with the skies clearing and the technical issues sorted, what happened next? What went down in Sunny Messina? Well, ELSF productions always take a few liberties with the Bard so there was an opening sequence in an airport that might not have been in the original and there were a few comedy asides that were added in to give it a bit more of a contemporary feel. Oh, and the dance sequences to Dua Lipa and “Mambo Italiano”. The Dua Lipa song is one we dance to in Dance Fitness and someone from my class was there on the front row so we were tempted to jump and add our own moves but you’ll be pleased to know we resisted. Someone next to me did get drafted in to the one-line role of the Sexton though, to much applause.

© YIODA NICHOLAOU

Contemporary costumes and songs aside, it’s actually pretty faithful to the text. Nearly all the dialogue is pure Shakespeare, delivered in a way that makes it accessible and relatable. The bantz between Beatrice and Benedick in the opening scene is up there as some of Shakespeare’s snappiest dialogue, rivalling the Hermia and Helena fight in the speed-punning event. Ursula Early as Beatrice and Kieran Garland as Benedick do not disappoint and you can really feel the tension between them. I will say at this point that I’m never convinced by the prospect of B&B as a long-term couple….it’s all very well to have an enemies to friends trope but I feel like the events of the play don’t really alter Leonato’s prediction that “if they were but a week married, they would talk themselves mad”.  Still, the love-hate dynamic makes for an entertaining show.

© YIODA NICHOLAOU

I always think it’s a bit futile nitpicking Shakespeare but this plot more than any makes no sense at all. The motivation of Don John to mess with Claudio and Hero is cloudy at best and without that drama, there really would be very little plot at all. But that’s fine and all part of the experience of watching a Shakespeare comedy. You have to accept that all siblings look identical, all Friars suggest faking your own death and all long lost families will eventually be reunited. Then you can relax and just enjoy the ridiculousness of it all.

Speaking of Claudio and Hero, I must give a shout out to Isambard Rawbone and Londiwe Mthembu who played the couple with tenderness and wide-eyed innocence. Neither character gets huge amounts of depth in the script so there isn’t much to work with but Hero was a joy to watch throughout and Claudio suitably lovelorn apart from that bit where he inexplicably decides to publicly humiliate her. Dang, I said I wasn’t going to nitpick didn’t I?

© YIODA NICHOLAOU

You’ll notice the sunshiny palate in all of these cast photos, which gave the production the feeling of summer even if the sun itself hadn’t done us the courtesy of rocking up. Deck chairs, cocktails and even a swimming pool added to the holiday vibe. Don’t ask how they made Benedick swim but it was a hilarious highlight. Thinking about it, it might have been a river instead of a pool but still, it was an impressive feat to recreate in the park.

© YIODA NICHOLAOU

Physical comedy was an important part of the show, especially as there is so much of the plot that involves people hiding while other people pretend not to have seen them. That opens up all kinds of possibilities with hatches, bushes and watering cans and ELSF took every opportunity going, even involving the audience in asking to help them hide. This makes it visual enough for the smaller members of the audience to enjoy, while not detracting from the plot in any way. It must be exhausting to perform such a physical show so many times over a weekend but the actors showed no signs of flagging. Maybe they were powered by the sunshine.

© YIODA NICHOLAOU

Aside from the two main couples, there were four other actors – Alistair Brown as Don John and the Friar, Lauren Hendricks as Don Pedro  and Margaret, Natasha Mula as Conrade, Messenger and Ursula and Paul Willcocks as Leonato and Borachio. The four other actors were also doubling up in the scenes with the Watch so everyone was working pretty hard, especially with the multiple costume changes and a green room that’s basically just a tree. Lauren Hendricks also sang most of the linking songs and did so beautifully. Sigh no more, ladies. It did take me a while to realise that they’d gender-swapped Don Pedro’s character as I just assumed it was a girl playing the part of a man  – coming from a girls’ school, I always had to play the men’s parts. My Year 8 Shylock was legendary. But after a few references to Don John’s sister wooing Hero confused me, I finally clocked. It did work in terms of the plot but I’m clearly not that quick. Like Snug, I am slow of study.

The ensemble worked well together, switching between all those parts seamlessly and bursting into a hip hop rap every now and then just to shake things up a bit. The airport scene at the beginning paid off at the end when the final scene between Benedick and Beatrice became a Richard Curtis-esque dash to the airport. In the script, I seem to remember Beatrice is just kinda standing there and Benedick takes her mask off….but this was much more fun.

And fun is what this production is all about. It’s not to be taken too seriously – it’s Shakespeare for the bawdy masses, just as the original performances would have been. The audience were politely sipping Prosecco rather than jugs of ale but it’s the same vibe. I always regret not taking a full picnic as the people next to us had but there’s always next year. Fingers crossed they’ll be lucky with the weather again.

Of course, by the time we were walking home via the ice cream van it was raining again. But what else do you expect in the London summer? As Will himself said: “The spring, the summer, the childing autumn, angry winter, change their wonted liveries, and the mazed world, by their increase, now knows not which is which”

But I call this season ice cream and umbrellas season:

“Much Ado About Nothing” continues to tour through July and into August. Click here for tickets and more info. No disclaimer needed as I paid for the tickets but all opinions remain honest and my own.

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Fox in a Box Escape Rooms – 16/06/24

Posted on July 6, 2024 by katese11

It’s taken me a little while to write this one up because, really, what can you say about escape rooms? You can’t give away too much otherwise they’ll find you and lock you up for real. But I’ll try to give you a flavour of the experience as best I can.

First though, the flavour of lunch. You can’t lock three teenage boys and a tween girl up in a room without feeding them first. Roo wanted to try Grab Burger, which was at Dalston Junction, just opposite the escape room. Sadly it was closed so we walked up to Honest Burger near Dalston Kingsland. It wasn’t super quick service but the staff were really friendly and we had time to kill so that was fine. And the burgers were good  – I had the Dalston special, which came with a little pot of jerk gravy. I could have done with a nap after all that food but no, onwards.

We still had a little time to kill before we went in, so we hung out in Dalston Curve Garden, which was heaving on a sunny day (remember those? We had about three of them in June). We found a small table and enough chairs to have some of Roo’s birthday cake and relax while the teens hit each other with sticks. Standard stuff.

Then it was time to go and get locked up. We’ve been past Fox in a Box many times but it doesn’t look big enough to have three separate escape rooms inside. Turns out that you don’t need much space for prison cells. There are three options of games to play and we’d chosen “Prison Break” which was meant to be Intermediate difficulty. There’s no formal age limit but under 14s need to be accompanied by an adult.

I can tell you that we spent some time trying to solve a tanagram puzzle in the lobby and the fights over that made me think we were doomed. There are also lockers and loos while you wait so leave some time to get yourself sorted before the experience begins. There’s also the Wall of Shame, which we assumed we’d end up on.

Then you are ushered through the portal and into the prison. The six of us were split into two cells by the very serious prison officer and from there we were on our own….albeit with a few handy hints from a mysterious voice.

I won’t tell you too much about the experience except to say remember the principle of Mise-en-scène – everything in an escape room is there for a reason, even if the reason for some things is to act as a red herring and throw you off the scent. There was a fair bit of a lateral thinking needed and even a bit of maths but the mysterious voice kept us on track and we managed to escape with a full nine minutes left on the clock. Given we utterly failed last time we did an escape room, I’m pretty pleased with that result. We celebrated with juice from the nearby Co-Op and sent the spare teens packing.

So a fun afternoon out, if a little on the pricey side. It lasts 90 minutes so definitely good to have lunch and a bit of chill out time before going in. It was the right kind of challenging for teenagers and their increasingly brainfogged parents. The orange t-shirts were a nice touch and we got sent team photos for no extra cost. The staff were all super helpful – when not in character – and it felt like everything had been considered in making it a smooth experience. Plus, we won so no Wall of Shame this time! Maybe we’ll be back to try out some of the other rooms….

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LWAT is 800! A Guide to Leaving London

Posted on July 3, 2024 by katese11

I mean, not permanently..what the heck kinda move do you think this is for an anniversary post? Though I do have a bit of a blogchange coming up which will surprise and shock you all. But that’s still a week or so away, so watch this space.

No, I’m talking about leaving London for a weekend or maybe a short break using one of our eight glorious railway termini. Yes, that’s the link to the 800th post. It’s a bit lame but it came to me as I was on my way to Leeds at the weekend, which slightly doing anything more practical for the 800th post. Eva and I travelled about 400 miles in total so if you times it by the two of us, I guess that’s 800 miles covered. But more relevantly, we got to hang out in Kings Cross for a while which is one of the eight I’ll be covering. I know the Monopoly board tells you there are only four but Monopoly lies to you. In so many ways.

We’re starting at the North-West corner though, with:

Paddington

Where is it? Nearish Central London, nearish to Hyde Park on one side and Little Venice on the other.

Where can you get to? Wales! Which used to be handy for nephron exchanges before half of them moved up here. Reading, which I used frequently when I lived there and Nathan was in London. Various other places along the M4 corridor like Bath and Bristol and places in the West Country, like Plymouth and Penzance.

Have I blogged about it? It’s popped up a few times.  We passed through last October between the Rickroll tunnels and candy floss the size of Eva’s head. And we picked up special packages there in 2017 before walking through Hyde Park to the Royal Albert Hall. We also went there on Nathan’s birthday in 2022, mainly to try out the new (at the time) Elizabeth Line.

Is there a Pret? Yes

Is there a Five Guys in the vicinity? Noooo, doesn’t seem that way

Any special features? Everyone loves petting the statue of Paddington, don’t they? He’s moved around a bit but photos on Google Maps from last month suggest he’s still there and up for selfie opportunities. This picture of mine was from quite some years ago though.

What’s the overall vibe? Big, echoey, confusing tube interchanges…it’s basically three or four stations in one. Nice roof.

 

Then moving East to:

Marylebone

Where is it? Kinda near Regents Park but not really close to anywhere

Where can you get to? Birmingham and Oxford mainly, with stops along the way in the Chilterns. Eva and I went there to get our connection to Stratford-Upon-Avon last year, changing at Leamington Spa

Have I blogged about it? Yes, on that visit in 2023 but also on our Monopoly jaunt for the 500th post (which was a lot more effort than this post)

Is there a Pret? Yes and this was post-subscription so of course I went there. Even though it’s really hard to balance coffee and suitcases

Is there a Five Guys in the vicinity? It looks like there’s one on Baker Street but it’s a rare Central London branch that we haven’t blessed with our presence.

Any special features? As mentioned above, it’s a Monopoly square so that makes it special but also it has a tiny version of Bicester Village in the middle of the concourse.

What’s the overall vibe? Super-cute, retro, redbrick. Half the appeal of going to Stratford-Upon-Avon was the chance to catch a train from here.

And again to:

Euston

Where is it? Very Central London, right on the Euston Road. Not near anywhere pretty but handy for UCL and museums like the Wellcome Collection.

Where can you get to? All the biggies of the North and the Midlands – Manchester, Birmingham, Liverpool as well as a bunch of places in North-West London that are basically the Bakerloo Line. I also took my niece there to eat Burger King chips one night a few weeks ago because of…complications. We sat in cinema-style seating and watched the stressed-out passengers trying to catch the last train. I also caught the train to Manchester on a work trip there a few months ago and it was an underwhelming experience

Have I blogged about it? It certainly featured in this post, about one of the most surreal moments of my life. We also visited on mine and Roo’s big adventure to see the Cbeebies panto in 2014. Apparently we also visited in 2013 on our way to Southport but I have very little recollection of this. And even further back, in the very first month of the blog, it featured in this classic post.

Is there a Pret? Yes and it’s really crowded and stressful….there’s a one-way system and nowhere to sit.

Is there a Five Guys in the vicinity? Not super near, no

Any special features? Well, there’s the way that you now have to leave the station to get into the tube which really confuses people like me. And I think there’s a street food market outside but I’m not sure whether that’s permanent or a pop-up.

What’s the overall vibe? Shed-like, hectic, full of commuters and people who seem a bit cross. Apparently it used to be beautiful but the frontage was all torn down in the 60s.

Even further East to:

Kings Cross

Where is it? Near Euston really but with easy access from Islington

Where can you get to? The North – we were there just a few days ago for our trip to Leeds. But you can go even further than Leeds to places like Newcastle and Edinburgh. Plus of course Paris and Brussels from the neighbouring St Pancras.

Have I blogged about it? A surprising amount, yes. Firstly in 2011 before all the redevelopment when it was just a claustrophobic glorified waiting room. Then two years later when I seemed amazed at all the changes and we visited the the Camley Street Natural Park. Then various posts about the fountains, the canal and ukulele busking there last Christmas. Plus a very special trip there on Eva’s 9 3/4 birthday

Is there a Pret? I think there are about three and at least one has decent seating even if the queuing system is chaotic.

Is there a Five Guys in the vicinity? Yes, and we went there both ways on the Yorkshire trip last weekend. Saturday AND Sunday fries

Any special features? I love the roof. I really cannot stop taking pictures of it every time we’re there. I know I’m sad. But it is a thing of beauty. Plus, a fun kids area in the waiting room and a birdcage with a swing it in just outside

And of course THE tourist attraction  – a bit of wall with a trolley sticking out of it and adjoining gift shop. Not to be missed!

What’s the overall vibe? I would never have said this in 2011 but it’s pretty chilled out. Having Granary Square to hang out in before your train makes all the difference as you can watch the boats on the canal. Also the interior is relatively spacious even when it’s crowded and there are a nice range of eateries (Leon and a mini-Giraffe). A definite favourite.

South a bit and East again to:

Liverpool Street

Where is it? Just on the line between the City of London and the start of East London. Handy for the City but also close to Spitalfields and Brick Lane

Where can you get to? Mainly Essex and Cambridgeshire destinations, with a quick link to the seaside. Plus all the Overground lines to Cheshunt, Enfield and Chingford.

Have I blogged about it? Yes, which seems weird seeing as I walk through it hundreds of times a year. so it’s a bit like blogging about our local Tesco. But we lingered back in 2021 on our way to Adventure Island and of course we went there on the Monopoly day. And I took a bunch of English class students for lunch there after the Lord Mayor’s Parade.

Is there a Pret? Yes – at least three in easy reach and I’m a regular at two of them. I know all the staff. Don’t judge me.

Is there a Five Guys in the vicinity? Yes. Weirdly narrow stairs but nice and spacious upstairs

Any special features? The Kindertransport statue is always kinda moving, even when there are pigeons perched on all the children’s heads. There was an episode of “The Piano” being filmed there when I walked through the other day but I suspect a lot of the stations will have that same claim to fame.

Plus there’s that weird rusty brown obelisk thing at the Elizabeth Line end that doesn’t seem to serve any purpose.

What’s the overall vibe? A confusing mix of commuters and tourists heading for the Stansted Express. Both groups get very tetchy with each other when there’s a queue at the gates. The station concourse is spaciousish but you’ll probably still walk into someone if you don’t look where you’re going.

Heading South to:

London Bridge

Where is it? Just south of the river, opposite the City

Where can you get to? Kent mostly – I think I went there on the way to Orpington and Herne Bay but I don’t think I’ve caught a train from there in years. There’s also the Thameslink to Luton in the opposite direction to where you’d expect a South London station to connect to.

Have I blogged about it? I’ve blogged about the surrounding area a lot but I’m not sure the station itself has ever come up much. the trip to Orpington and back in a morning is referenced in this post but nothing about the station. There are lots of posts about trips to the Globe and the Tate Modern, which are both in the vicinity and this trip last year to Delight in Borough Yards

Is there a Pret? Yes but Eva was sick in it in 2015 so we can never go back

Is there a Five Guys in the vicinity? No but there are so many nice places to eat in Borough Market that even Eva can accept the lack of fries.

Any special features? That giant Shard thing is quite a feature but it would really eat into your schedule if you were in a rush to get a train and wanted to go view the loo with a view. Obviously the view from the bridge itself is pretty special and I can spend ages there taking pictures of Tower Bridge and the City. The incredibly steep steps coming off the bridge are special in their own way too and there are often random statues along the embankment there.

At one point, I swear the station was missing a Platform 7 – with signs to Platforms 1-6 and 8-14 (Guess which platform we needed?) That’s pretty special.

What’s the overall vibe? Very commutery and hectic but with the river nearby for a welcome breather.

Heading back West again to:

Waterloo

Where is it? Also just south of the river but further west – opposite Westminster and near our old Kennington haunts

Where can you get to? Why yes, I HAVE been waiting for thirty years for someone to ask me to recite all the stops between Winchester and Weymouth. What, you don’t want me to? Fine. I’ll just say it’s heading towards my own home turf of Hampshire plus the seaside delights of Dorset and the slightly less delightful delights of Portsmouth. Also handy for Surrey and if you’re insane, you can get the train to Reading from here instead of going from Paddington. But don’t blame me if you age a decade on that train.

Have I blogged about it? I’ve blogged a million times about the South Bank and stuff to do a mere stone’s throw from the station…it remains one of my favourite places to hang out even if we don’t live just down the road anymore. I’m sure I’ve mentioned the station itself before, like in this trip to Feltham in 2015 and a more recent meet up in 2021 when we had relatives coming up from Hampshire. And we saw the naked bike ride. Don’t click on that link expecting pictures tho.

Is there a Pret? Yes but you have to go up a flight of stairs to get in, which isn’t fun with luggage and would be completely impassable for a wheelchair or a buggy

Is there a Five Guys in the vicinity? No, they seem a bit sparse south of the river.

Any special features? The view as you come into Waterloo never gets old – there is something so very London about glimpsing the Houses of Parliament and the London Eye as you pull in. There’s a whole new bit of the station that I haven’t explored yet so that might throw up some interesting features. And the clock that you meet people under is pretty iconic if you come from Hampshire. Also, do check out the graffiti tunnel if you have time before your train.

What’s the overall vibe? A fair amount of commuters rushing around but prone to flash mobs and people giving away free ice creams, which cheers things up a bit. The stepfree access is a bit out of the way but works once you know where you’re going. 

And back over the river to:

Victoria

Where is it? Central London, near Buckingham Palace and Hyde Park

Where can you get to? More seaside! Sussex destinations like Brighton and Littlehampton as well as less glamorous Kentish spots like Gravesend. We’ve picked relatives up from the coach station a few times too, but it’s not super close to the train station.

Have I blogged about it? Not really and I’ve only passed through it when I was childfree, I think…on my way to Worthing in 2022. It also gets a mention in this very stressful post from 2013. But we wandered around the area lots when we lived in South London and could walk to places like the secret paddling pool of Pimlico. 

Is there a Pret? Yes, a couple and I’m sure I’ve been to at least one but I can’t remember much about it

Is there a Five Guys in the vicinity? Apparently so! But we haven’t been there…we don’t seem to go to Victoria very often

Any special features? Didn’t a baby get left in a handbag somewhere around here?

What’s the overall vibe? Super touristy, with all the attractions nearby and the Gatwick Express. No one has any idea of what they’re doing so you will almost certainly trip over a suitcase if you’re not careful. Or maybe a handbag.

 

So I know after reading 2,400 words about train stations you’re desperate to know how I rank these eight. Well, wait no longer:

#8 Euston – just so lacking in character theseadays

#7 London Bridge – sorry, you’re just not that useful and the station itself has nothing much to recommend it

#6 Victoria – crowded and I just don’t seem to have used it often enough to love it

#5 Paddington – useful but an awkward trek from everywhere we’ve ever lived

#4 Liverpool Street – not the most aesthetically pleasing but super useful and has its charms

#3 Waterloo – this may be mainly nostalgic but also it has the South Bank right outside

#2 Marylebone – such a small and niche station has no right to score so high but have you seen it? So cute and twee and takes you to other places that are also cute and twee

#1 Kings Cross – some great destinations, the best outside space and that showstopper of a roof. A deserving winner!

 

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Club de Fromage Daytime Party – 22/06/24

Posted on June 23, 2024 by katese11

I know – I’m getting adventurous in my middle age. Not content with Disco 2000ing in the evenings every few months, I’ve now taken to over 30s daytime clubbing at Scala. Wild times indeed.

And in that spirit, we started the afternoon with a nice margarita from Sons and Daughters in Granary Square. In case you hadn’t worked it out by now, this was a childfree excursion. My kids might be ageing rapidly but last I checked neither of them were quite in the over 30s bracket yet. So we started almost as we meant to go on – I must admit, getting trapped on the wrong side of a cycle race wasn’t in the plan.

But we found a way out via a kind of footbridge over the track and we were free to go party.

I haven’t been to Scala in years. The last time may have been in 2002 when Bob and I were promoting Scooby Doo the move there. I know a photo exists but sadly I can’t find it anywhere. I also remember going to see Gorillaz there in 2001ish and both times I thought it was a huge space. When we walked in yesterday, all of us thought it seemed tiny compared to what we remembered but maybe we’ve just grown.

It being 3PM, the dancefloor took a little while to get going but when they played “Crash” by the Primitives I decided I might as well go for it. It’s not like I’m a stranger to starting a dancefloor. And seeing as the playlist promised “Pop” and “Cheese”, I wasn’t sure how many danceable songs there would be.

Turns out, quite a few. We were on the dancefloor solidly all afternoon, with only the necessary bar and toilet breaks. Some of the music did fall into an indie girl’s nightmare playlist – the kind of songs that were used to torture me in the student union at the turn of the century. I couldn’t quite bring myself to dance to Steps, Ricky Martin or the Spice Girls but the full-on cheese of the decade before that is just fine by me. So we wailed along to Bonnie Tyler and quick stepped to Footloose with no shame at all. And there were plenty of songs that were in the rock and indie genre too. Bob remarked that Kurt Cobain would not be overly happy to be classed as “cheese” but I guess he doesn’t get an opinion.

But no one goes to Club de Fromage for the groundbreaking playlist. It’s all the extras – confetti cannons, balloons, limbo competitions – that make it a fun night. Or afternoon, in this case. And the four Club de Fromage dancers were what kept the party moving. Whether they were dressed as grannies doing the splits, football fans tossing out giant balls into the crowd or rock chicks with mullets and inflatable guitars they did everything with a grin on their faces and a sense of fun that was pretty infectious. My favourite was the one in the wedding dress, who constantly looked like she was living her best life.

So yes, three middle-aged mothers survived an afternoon’s clubbing with only a small amount of backache to show for it. Staggering out into the slightly jarring sunlight, we took refuge in the nearby Pizza Union for dinner and some frozen mojitos. Rock and roll, indeed!

If you want to see what it was all about, have a look at my video on YouTube here:

No disclaimer needed cause I paid for this one but for more info, click here

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Family Sword Fighting Demonstration at the Globe – 01/06/24

Posted on June 1, 2024 by katese11

Copyright Pete Le May

Half term may be nearly over but the summer holidays aren’t far away and I bet you’re looking for something to entertain the tween or teen in your life. Well, I have just the thing for you. It helps if your kids are into DnD and/or Shakespeare but luckily I have a Shakespeare obsessive who doesn’t mind a bit of DnD and a DnD obsessive who doesn’t mind a bit of Shakespeare. So a demonstration of Shakespearean sword fighting seemed perfect for us.

What wasn’t perfect was the signal failure at Clapton that meant all the trains were cancelled. We wearily flagged down a 275 and headed to Woodford, via the North Circular – a diversion that adds an extra few minutes to an already lengthy trip.

But the good news is that once we got to Woodford, a Central line train was just about to leave and so we jumped on and were at St Pauls within half an hour.

Plus, we were sitting opposite two small doggos, which pleased Eva. And you get to play the Central line Museum of Illusions game. Where’s your head at, Roo?

None of this left much time for lunch which was, of course, at Eva’s preferred fries dispensary. Happily, there’s a branch just next to St Paul’s so we managed to grab some food and walk over the wobbly bridge in time for the workshop to start at 2. In fact, we had a few spare minutes to wash the ketchup off our hands and relax in the the tent downstairs.

As it happened, the workshop wasn’t in the main bit of the Globe at all but around the corner, at the entrance marked as “Guided Tours Entrance”. We had a few minutes to kill before the workshop started so posed a bit for this photo opportunity:

As per the instructions, I didn’t take any photos during the workshop itself but here’s a press image so you can get the idea:

Copyright John Wildgoose

Our hosts were two actors called Marie and Rob. I believe Marie is also a fight co-ordinator but they both knew a lot about the artform and how swords were handled in Shakespeare’s day. Apparently swords were as common a sight in Shakespeare’s London as cars are today and, like cars, there were varying degrees of quality and prestige. They talked us through four different types of weaponry and at each stage, demoed the weapons with a fight. Occasionally they reminded us to not try this at home and I have tried to re-enforce that with Roo but he seems keen to try out the new knowledge he’s absorbed. Maybe he’ll be able to work it into GCSE Drama somehow. I should also say that the weapons were blunted as they’re stage weapons and they would also have been blunted in Shakespeare’s time.

The first weapon was the Rapier, which was demoed alongside the dagger. As well as showing off their duelling skills, the hosts also linked the different weapons to characters in different Shakespeare plays – from Tybalt vs Mercutio to Prince Hal vs Hotspur. There’s a lot of information but interspersed with the practical demonstrations, which included some very dramatic death scenes. I forget all the types of swords we were shown but Reuben, who was obviously listening well, tells me there were longswords, shortswords and staffs. Plus one which had a Scottish name that none of us can remember but it was used along with a shield in the Scottish play. I should probably pause at this point to apologise to Marie and Rob for the number of times that Reuben said the name of the Scottish play. I think he underestimated just how superstitious actors are.

There was a bit of time for questions and the hosts answered everything we threw at them, such as whether there were any female swords(wo)men, whether anyone in Shakespeare’s company ever died on stage from a swordfight and whether the hosts themselves had ever sustained any injuries from swordfighting. If you want to know the answers to these questions, you should probably just book tickets to go. No spoilers here.

At the end, we got the chance to handle two of the swords ourselves. They were held at the other end by our hosts but I promised the kids I’d magic-eraser the hands out so it looked like they were freely wielding the weaponry. In the interests of transparency, I’ve included both versions here – health & safety version followed by clumsily edited version. No one lost any limbs, that’s all you need to know.

So, here’s Reuben with the Rapier:

 

And Eva with the same, stabbing Rob to death:

And both kids with (I think) the longsword:

 

It was a really fun afternoon out and really interesting to learn a bit about the art of stage fighting. For two Drama students it was a handy lesson and feeds into their special interests as well. It’s probably more for older kids than littlies as the swords are quite heavy and, even in this controlled environment, could be dangerous in toddler hands. Besides, there’s a lot of listening to be done and a basic understanding of Shakespeare comes in useful. But for my two, it was pretty much spot on and it meant we got to see a bit of the Globe we’d never visited before and there were some cool things to see along the way. There’s even a fake but lifesize tree down there:

So definitely one for the older and geekier kids in your life. Don’t forget the (near-obligatory) trip to Spice Mountain in Borough Market afterwards, to stock up on weird flavourings and fruit powders. I didn’t get a photo of Eva’s spoils of war but trust me, our spice drawer is now full restocked.

The sword fighting demonstrations run until 27th October. For tickets and more info, click here

Disclaimer: I received free tickets in exchange for a review. All opinions remain honest and my own. 

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Sunday Sunday Here Again

Posted on May 26, 2024 by katese11

It’s a Sunday afternoon before a Bank Holiday and I am doing nothing in particular but it’s given me time to write about what we got up to the last Sunday before a Bank Holiday. Which was also nothing very exciting but it was un-exciting in a geeky music fan way.

The short version is that we found St Charles Square, which has recently been memorialised in a blur song:

The “why” of this story is a bit longer. Blur have featured on this blog a few times – from a trip to France where I referenced every song on Parklife to actually seeing them in the flesh at Wembley last year (albeit from a long way back). And of course, we have this Parklife landmark just a few minutes’ walk away from home:

Essentially, we found ourselves childfree and directionless in West London that Sunday. Not quite lost on the Westway, but we did at one point pass Under The Westway:

We’d dropped Eva off at a bowling party in Queensway and Reuben was playing DnD with friends in Dalston so we could have just gone home and waited for the chicks to return but we were so close to that Square that I figured we might as well jump on a bus and see what there was to sing about.

Funnily enough, the bus we’d got on the way there from church also had a bit of a blur-themed stop:

From Queensway, we jumped on a number 70 bus which not only passed under the Westway but also crossed Portobello Road, which I think is referenced on a song from “Modern Life is Rubbish”. I did not get a good photo of the sign.

But here we are at the St Charles Square bus stop:

We were on the lookout for the sign in this tweet but  – spoiler – we never did find it. We did walk round the entire square, which is no way a square, and found a few signs but none that matched exactly.

And when I say it’s not a square, I really mean it. These yellow highlighted bits are what is labelled as “St. Charles Square” and yes, we did walk down each of these offshoots to see if we could find the right sign.

And on the unhighlighted bits, we found some interesting Things to See, like this house which is more plant than dwelling:

And this office building, which used to be a furniture depository:

It felt like we were in Hampstead Garden Suburb or some kind of far off village rather than a few minutes north of Notting Hill.

After such a lot of adventuring, we naturally retired to the pub:

And on the way back to Ladbroke Grove happened to catch a band called Phantom Limbs, rocking up a storm on the pavement:

So this might have been the epitome of LWAT “Just Wandering” but it was a fun afternoon’s walk and another pop culture landmark to add to our list, alongside the house from “Spaced” and the phone box from the back of “Ziggy Stardust”. Not bad for a Sunday Sunday walk in the park….

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Legoland – 04/05/24

Posted on May 8, 2024 by katese11

It’s been a couple of years since our last trip to Legoland but as soon as I started planning, I remembered the drill. Harvester breakfast, check:

We still miss the pre-Covid buffet but you can’t dwell on the past indefinitely.

Trolling the kids that we weren’t actually going to Legoland and were planning on staying in Harvester all day for the free coffee refills, check. They didn’t believe us when we tried to tell them that this *is* Legoland, Windsor:

Tickets bought with Clubcard vouchers, check. Parking bought online, check. Ridiculous amounts of snacks, check. Legoland itself did throw us a slight curveball by directing us to a brand new car park that wasn’t there last time we went but that’s OK – we remembered where we’d left the car because it was by the new woodland village that wasn’t there last time we went and still seemed to be under construction. I think the adventure golf by the front gates was also new and the giant letters as we drove in all had new minifigs. Times, they are a-changing.

And for us too there was change afoot – Eva was in charge, given it was her birthday treat, and she asked to turn left at the top of the hill instead of right. Like Zoolander, we never go left so this was a bit of a novelty. Roo had wanted to start at the Star Wars exhibition, given it was May the fourth but sadly that was no longer there. I think I read somewhere that they lost the licence.

On the way, we stopped at the sweet shop by the hill train to buy some refillable cups. We don’t always get these but it looked to be a hot day and the idea of being able to just grab a cold drink whenever we wanted was appealing. It’s £14 per cup, which is steep, but we got two to share between the four of us and that worked fine. It’s ten minutes between refills so we couldn’t exactly share one cup between four like we have done in the past but neither did we want to have to have a full cup each every time we filled up and then all have to be carrying something….so this worked.

With the preliminaries finally out of the way, we were ready for our first activity. And while Eva had Miniland in mind, we found something along the way – the Ferrari-sponsored “Build and Race”. There was a very short queue, which Roo used to add a Lord of the Rings reference to our day:

Then we were in after just a few minutes. The first room is a lifesize Ferrari made of Lego, which I’m sure some punters would spend a long time examining. We had a quick pose and moved on to the building room next door.

We did get confused and think that the idea was to design cars on the screens in this room but the “lights flash” buttons were actually controlling the Ferrari model. The actual idea was to build a mini Ferrari and race it on the tracks:

Sensors would give you your lap time and display it on the screen. One track also had a camera in it for action replays. All very hgih tech but the concept was scuppered by a more low tech problem. Well, two related problems.

The first being a distinct lack of wheels in the brick trays:

A sign near the exit made us think this might be due to light-fingered wheel enthusiasts.

The second problem being that the wheels were quite grippy so actually the cars didn’t roll well down the tracks and rarely made it as far as the sensors. It might be a technique issue but Reuben experimented and found that it worked better to just throw a small stack of bricks down than anything even vaguely car-shaped.

Eva, meanwhile, had located the camera in Track 2 and was using it to rickroll people. Standard tween stuff.

There was also a giant virtual racetrack at the end of the room and you could scan your car to make an avatar of sorts for racing round. That was fun, even if Reuben’s avatar looked like a small pile of bricks, for obvious reasons.

We were in there for about 30 minutes I reckon and it’s not a place I’ve ever noticed before – I don’t know whether it’s new or just out of our usual route but it was good to start with something different and it’s interesting for older kids with an interest in cars and/or the law of physics. You can guess which one my geeky boy leans towards.

Next up, we considered the new Minifig Speedway. Eva talked a brave talk and we even stood in the queue for a bit but after watching the ride a few times, she changed her mind about wanting to go on it. I’m going to say that Nathan and I were both a bit relieved as I don’t think either of us really wanted to go on it either.

So instead, we went for the gentle delights of Miniland and trying to spot the bus that Eva remembered from the “Inside Legoland” TV show. We didn’t spot the bus but did get a photo of Roo in Canary Wharf, where he went for his actual work experience. Actual as in, it wasn’t just a small boy hanging around a Lego version of Canary Wharf and posing. I know – the latter seems the more plausible option, doesn’t it?

And we also got a shot of Eva in her beret by the Eiffel Tower. Hopefully we can get this too in IRL before the end of the year:

Next, we wandered down to the Kingdom of the Pharaohs, where there were more gentle delights on Desert Chase and Thunder Blazer, which are basically just a carousel and a swing ride. But Eva enjoyed them and Roo was game for the “flap your arms to make this work” patter on Thunder Blazer.

Then we went on Laser Raiders, which is an old favourite as it’s not very scary and the kids get to chill out in their own zone while we do the queueing. As we snaked round the queue with the kids out of sight and not much to do, I started frantically refreshing Google on my phone for any news on the mayoral election. No real news was forthcoming but I did reach the front of the queue more cautiously optimistic than when we’d joined. That might be because I downed half a packet of Fruitella and made art out of the wrappers to stop myself draining my phone battery. No, I am not going to share my wrapper-art. Sorry.

We had a quick go on the PS4s on the way out of Laser Raiders and then decided to be a bit more intentional about where we wanted to go next. The queue for Laser Raiders had taken an hour or so and it was 13:30 already so we were slightly running out of time before we’d even really got started.

We decided to go to Mythica, stopping briefly at the loos in Heartlake City on the way. There Eva remembered how much she’d enjoyed the Hydra’s Challenge last year. It was another long queue, so we sat down for a few minutes to have some crisps before joining it.

I decided to let Reuben drive the boat again, slightly against my better judgement. At least I wasn’t feeling as seasick as I was last time we went on this ride but still, I was slightly dizzy afterwards. The announcement said we’d be battling Duo the Hydra, which made us think that this is what happened when you didn’t complete your Duolingo….Duo evolves from an angry green owl into an absolutely furious, two-headed abomination.

Quick, stop whatever you’re doing and complete a sentence about potatoes. You have many of them but you don’t have a cupboard.

Anyway, Hydra’s Challenge is fun but if you’re at the back you’ll get a rougher ride and act as human shield for the blasts of water. It’d be good when it’s hot out but it just so happened that we went on it during one of the only slightly chilly spots of the whole day and I packed waterproofs for the kids but not for me. Ah well, I dried out and warmed up eventually.

As is tradition by now, Nathan took Eva on the Fairytale Brook while Roo and I went on the helicopters. None of us want a repeat of the 2018 incident. But we darn near had a 2024 incident as our helicopter got stranded at the top of the pole and wouldn’t come back down. Much as Roo kept pushing the “down” lever it was not going down and we were pretty high up. When we did go down a bit, it was when a distinct “clunk” and then no more movement.

Nathan and Eva had reappeared after their trip on HorrorBrook so I tried to signal to them that we might be in a little bit of trouble. They didn’t necessarily pick up on my signals and just kept waving cheerily back at us and taking photos. Eventually, I tried turning the helicopter to the left and that got us past the sticking point and back to the ground. Who knew that the Duplo Airport was just as Xtreme as its watery neighbour?

Again, I was feeling a bit motion sick after all that so as we passed the Haunted House Monster Party I mentioned that I was glad Eva didn’t want to go on it because it was the last thing I felt like doing right that moment. Then Reuben clocked that there was no queue at all and Eva suddenly decided that she did want to go on. So I found myself in a disorientating spinning room with a very tight lap bar. The motion sickness remedy that absolutely no one recommends. There was a fair bit of faffing from the staff at the start as well, because the ride wasn’t full and they kept counting spaces and counting again like they couldn’t believe it. I mean we could barely believe it either, as last time we’d queued for an hour. But it did break the spooky atmosphere somewhat to have quite so much fussing. The ride itself was fun and I still can’t quite figure out how they do it. I’m just glad that Eva wasn’t screaming in my ear this time.

I’d promised Eva that we could visit The Hungry Troll at some point, which was a chip shop in Mythica. I don’t normally stop for any meals between Harvester and Heston but it was her birthday and she wanted chips so who am I to deny her?

Turns out I couldn’t deny her but the eponymous troll could. The chip shop had closed already and the statue of the troll with his handfuls of chips was just…well, trolling us really. So we checked the app and set off in search of treasure at Pirate Shores.

Bounty successfully plundered! And despite all my meal-avoiding at Legoland over the years, it seems that buying chips is not actually going to bankrupt us. In fact, they’re cheaper than Five Guys but the portions aren’t nearly as generous. Still, salty fries are one of my recommended motion sickness cures and they worked a treat. So much that I was ready for a rollercoaster, albeit a very tame one.

Oh yeah, Dragon’s Apprentice. That’s about our level. Reuben used the in-queue Lego to leave what is fast becoming “his tag”:

It was gone 5pm by this point but the park didn’t close till 6 so we thought we could squeeze one more ride in. Looking at the app, Hydra’s Challenge only had a five minute queue so guess where the birthday girl wanted to return to? Yes, that’s right – with the weather rapidly cooling down and the sun going in, it was time for the birthday girl’s mother to get soaked for a second time.

I’ll leave you with that thought. Happy family days out…!

 

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