Happy belated Christmas dear readers! Apologies for the lateness of this post but there have been some complications this Crimbo time. But we seem to have landed the other side so here’s a much delayed review of when we went to Kew for the Christmas light trail.
So I thought I was being real smart this year by booking a Premier Inn for the night because, let’s face it, it is a schlep from HP to the opposite corner of London. Whichever way we go, it is always an hour and a half and no-one wants that journey after a late night light trail. Just for funsies, I checked the time when we were driving to Winchester for Christmas and sure enough, it was exactly 90 minutes from our house to passing by the Victoria Gate. Now, who’s up for trying to make on bike or foot in the same time?
Anyway, all of this is why I booked a hotel but I didn’t really budget time for checking in on the way to Kew after work. I thought the hotel was at the foot of Kew Bridge, where the Costa is, but I was completely wrong and it was a bus ride away down Brentford High Street. Which all added time to a tight turnaround between finishing work and getting in through the Elizabeth Gate at 19:20. We’d met Nathan at Waterloo, jumped on the 18:07 train to Kew Bridge and were doing well but it all just took a little longer than anticipated. The hotel was indeed very close to Kew Gardens but there was a small watery barrier in the way and the family were distinctly un-up for trying to swim it. So after we checked in, we took the bus back to Kew Bridge and got stuck in some rather gnarly traffic. You don’t need a step-by-step on this but all you need to know is that we made it through the gate at 19:20 exactly. I don’t know how strict they are on last entry to the trail but I wasn’t about to try it out.
So onto the Christmas trail itself! It does feel like you start in slightly the wrong place when you go in any gate that’s not the Victoria Gate. I think the light show over the lake is meant to be the grand finale but from the Elizabeth Gate, it’s one of the first things you come across. And yes, we had to watch it end to end. It’s very pretty, especially the Christmas tree made out of water:
After that, and all the running to get there, it was time for some sustenance. So we stopped near the Victoria Gate for churros and a hot dog for Reuben. The dinner situation was very much “eat whenever you see something you want to eat”, which is why we were picking things up as we went.
Once we had food, we needed to actually make some progress on the trail and we got quite a lot done before the next stop. Like Snowy Lane:
Ombre:
And Sea of Light, which had a Danny Elfman soundtrack and trees that looked like cinnamon swirls:
Next up was the Fairground, which the kids enjoyed while Nathan and I ate teriyaki chicken from one of the stalls in the Food Village. Reuben more or less met the height restriction for the rides:
So they went on the carousel and the swing boats together, the latter of which was slightly terrifying. Apparently the only way to stop them swinging is by ramming them with giant wooden slats. They did make it off the boats in one piece though.
It’s always worth keeping an eye on the time when you get to this point of the trail as there’s still a way to go before the end and no one wants to get locked in the gardens. We bought Eva some chips to go as we ducked through the bauble gate to the next part.
We sped up a bit past the Sparkle Trees and the Baton Show, which were pretty but not anything we need to linger over:
But we spent a long time on the bridge watching the “Fish are Jumping” installation, where lights appeared and disappeared in arcs over the water. There was more Danny Elfman music (possibly “Edward Scissorhands”?) and it was all very atmospheric. The only problem was that it was so dark that I couldn’t get a decent photo:
On the other side of the lake, there were more delights like the Electric Ribbon and the Fire Garden, which has that atmospheric firey smell as well as the visuals:
And Eva’s favourite, which she dubbed the “Gay Brick Road”. The volunteer there was living her best life, singing along to “Dancing Queen” as we danced along it:
And then that optimum photo opp, the Christmas Cathedral:
The last big thing after that was the Christmas Presents, which were a set of frames with multicoloured streamers, much like those ribbon doors you used to get in the 70s:
Naturally, this was a good place to do the “Homer going backwards through the hedge” meme, which the kids did at length.
Once we’d left and gone into the chilly December night, I was feeling pleased with the hotel decision. It might have been a complication earlier on but it was so nice to have a very short trip back and crash straight into a comfy bed.
The next morning, we had the chance to take in the sights of Kew in the daylight:
This confused us somewhat – is it a car park or not?
We also discovered that Kew Green is the real-life location of the London A-Z:
We left the suitcases at the hotel and spent the day pottering around Richmond, getting Black Sheep coffee and lunch from Leon and Five Guys. We’d had Premier Inn breakfast so didn’t need much topping up but the kids, as ever, had differing ideas about what they wanted. On the way home, we took the 65 bus back to the hotel and from there to Ealing Broadway:
My thought was that we could get the Elizabeth Line back to Liverpool Street and then the Weaver Line home from there. Which all worked fine but guess how long it took from hotel to HP? Yup, 90 minutes is correct….the investigations continue.
“Christmas at Kew” is on until 5th Jan. For tickets and more info, click here
